It was inevitable, and it was delicious. New Late Show host Stephen Colbert spent a bite-size portion of his debut making fun of Donald Trump, chronicling some of the GOP frontrunner’s headline-making comments from recent weeks. “I promise you, just like the rest of the media, I will be covering all of the presidential candidates…who are Donald Trump,” Colbert says in the above Trump round-up.
The video opens with a clip of Trump announcing he’s swearing off Oreos because Nabisco is moving a plant from Chicago to Mexico. “I’m not surprised that Donald Trump is willing to stand up to Big Cookie,” Colbert cracked. “After all, he’s the only candidate brave enough to deport the Keebler elves. ‘Hey, tree freaks, get your filthy, fudgey fingers off our jobs!'”
Colbert attempted a clunky Oreo-Trump metaphor, and he kept the cream-filled snacks nearby throughout the segment, indulging in a cream-filled treat every time he tells a Trump joke. The host touched on Trump’s hair (“What’s on top of his head is definitely his. Now it’s up to science to decide whether or not it’s hair”), his plan for a wall on the Mexican border and his popularity among white supremacists (“A lot of people like Trump, even white supremacists. Which is amazing because Trump’s not even white. He’s more Oompa-Loompamerican”).
Colbert tried to resist the cheap thrills of Oreos and Trump jokes, to no avail. “Someone on television should have a modicum of dignity,” he says. “And it could be me.” But by clip’s end, the host gives in to temptation, pouring a bag of cookies on his face as a Trump montage explodes onscreen.