Saturday Night Live poked fun at Donald Trump‘s diplomacy skills in a cold open where the president, played once again by Alec Baldwin, and his chief advisor Steve Bannon, played by the Grim Reaper, cold-call world leaders and threaten them with war.
“I’ve had a long day, I’m tired and cranky and feel like I could just freak out on somebody,” “Trump” said.
“Maybe you should call Australia,” Bannon suggested.
(Trump reportedly had a disastrous talk with the Australian prime minister, with John McCain performing some unsolicited damage control to restore the relationship with our ally. Even Bruce Springsteen mocked Trump over the diplomatic faux pas.)
Throughout his in-sketch phone calls with Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto and German Chancellor Angela Merkel, “Trump” bemoaned the current state of The Apprentice and addressed the gaffes his administration made in its first two weeks of office, from not knowing who Frederick Douglass was to the fictitious Bowling Green Massacre.
Speaking on the Muslim ban, the president said, “We had to do it because of that huge massacre at Bowling Green… It was horrible, so many people died, but actually they’re the lucky ones, because they don’t have to see how bad The Apprentice has gotten.”
When Merkel asked about the protests sweeping America, Trump replied, “Everyone is marching in the street, they are so upset about how bad The Apprentice has gotten.”
“I want to be serious for just a moment: Last week was Holocaust Remembrance Day, but as you know, six million people were at my inauguration. They were just so many people at my inauguration, but the media refuses to cover it, it’s so unfair,” the president told Merkel. “One day I’m going to write a memoir about this struggle, and call it My Struggle, what would that be in German, Angela?”
After numerous sophomoric attempts to get Nieto to agree to pay for the wall on the Mexican border, Bannon advised the president to bully a small nation to raise his spirits. However, a phone call to Zimbabwe has the complete opposite effect.
The sketch ended with Bannon’s Grim Reaper reassuming his chair at the president’s desk, with Trump relegated to a child’s desk beside him.
Also on the episode, Melissa McCarthy made a surprise appearance to savagely mock Trump’s press secretary Sean Spicer.