The subject of the skit is a young girl who tells Colbert that she’s “too scared to vote.” Colbert encourages her to participate in the democratic process. Meanwhile Stewart – sporting a red top hat, a sash bearing his own name, and a cartoonish southern accent – plays devil’s advocate. “If the girl does not want to vote, I say the girl does not have to vote,” he says.
Colbert argues in favor of ballot-casting by breaking into song and dance. “Voting gives a voice to people one and all/ From the richest robber baron to the lowliest dirt ball.” “They make the process speedy,” he continues, before passing the baton to bandleader Jon Batiste: “Except in black districts.”
The song doesn’t persuade Stewart that voting is necessary, but when his character finds out that Donald Trump is running for President (“I haven’t paid much attention,” Stewart jokes) he changes his tune. “Are you kidding me?” he exclaims. “That angry, tax- and draft-dodging little orange groundhog is running for President?”
But now the nonvoter offers a more complex argument for abstaining from the political process. “It’s not my fault the system gave us two unsavory folks,” she sings. “If either shared my values, I’d be first in line to vote/ But in civil oligarchy, we don’t have a real choice/ How can I change a system that won’t listen to my voice?”
Actor Javier Muñoz, from the play Hamilton, arrives at this moment to provide Colbert and Stewart with reinforcement. “We’ve gone through a lot, I know you’re temperature’s hot,” he raps. “But please tell me you’re not throwing away your shot.” The segment comes to a close with everyone finally in agreement about the importance of voting in this election.
“[Trump]’s endorsed by David Duke,” Stewart reminds viewers. “His tiny hands might get a nuke.”
From abortion to Zika, here are all the reasons you shouldn’t cast a vote for the GOP nominee. Watch here.