Jimmy Kimmel addressed crestfallen Clinton supporters on Wednesday night in the hopes of helping them cope with Trump’s election victory. “A lot of voters woke up this morning happy that Donald Trump had won the election, but the other half of them, especially here in California, were very upset,” Kimmel noted. “People were shocked, despondent, some were even crying.” As a result, the late-night host decided to walk his viewers through the five stages of grief.
The first stage in the process is denial, which Kimmel summarized as “no, the host of Celebrity Apprentice can’t possibly be our president, CNN must have the math wrong.” After that comes the anger stage: “Who do I blame for this?” Kimmel wondered. “Bernie? The FBI? Gary Johnson? Jill Stein?” “How is it possible that half the country is too busy to even vote?” he continued. “They all managed to play Pokémon Go.”
After getting that out of his system, Kimmel moved on to the third stage: bargaining. “Maybe this needed to happen to wake up everyone up,” he reasoned. “Maybe this is a good thing. Maybe he’ll only build the wall waist high, to keep short people out.” This rationalization period was quickly followed by depression, “where you get a spoon and you just eat peanut butter out of the jar.”
Finally, many jars of peanut butter later, Kimmel suggested that tearful voters will eventually reach acceptance – possibly with the aid of some narcotics. “No matter how you feel about it, Donald Trump is the president of the United States of America,” Kimmel said. “So thank god we legalized marijuana yesterday.”
California passed Proposition 64, a law legalizing recreational marijuana. Watch here.