Avenatti — who represented Stormy Daniels, inserted himself into the ongoing R. Kelly court battle and recently mulled a presidential bid of his own — was arrested Monday on accusations that he tried to shake down Nike by alleging the company was illegally paying high school athletes and their families to get them to attend certain colleges.
Colbert, however, cracked that Avenatti got the scheme entirely wrong: “We know that’s not how it works. Parents are supposed to secretly pay college coaches to pretend their students are star athletes.”
Avenatti allegedly told Nike he would disclose the supposed payments, unless they paid his client $1.5 million, and retained him as a lawyer for $15 to $25 million. Avenatti was even primed to go public with his information, taking to Twitter Monday to tease the news. Fifteen minutes later, however, the FBI showed up to arrest him.
“That’s the FBI promise,” Colbert joked, “if we don’t bring justice in 35 minutes or less, the perp walks free!”