See Stephen Colbert Recap Democratic Debate on ‘Late Show’ – Rolling Stone
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See Stephen Colbert Recap Democratic Debate on ‘Late Show’

“In the end, what did we get: 10 candidates, four moderators, three hours, two languages and hopefully, one person that can beat Donald Trump”

Stephen Colbert broke down all the sniping, griping and ramblings of the third Democratic primary debate on a live edition of The Late Show Thursday.

Airing immediately after the debate wrapped, Colbert spent his monologue showing highlights and slinging one-liners. He touched on Kamala Harris’ slow turn-around on certain criminal justice issues (“Are you a cop, you have to tell me if you’re a cop?”), Beto O’Rourke’s no-nonsense gun control plan (“That takes courage, and not just political courage — people in Texas have a lot of guns!”) and Amy Klobuchar’s questionable framing of the dangers of climate change as, “You know that movie The Day After Tomorrow, that’s today.” Colbert then blew his own mind with his reply: “And you know that movie, Yesterday? That’s tomorrow.”

Much of the monologue, however, was focused on the front-runners, like Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders and former Vice President Joe Biden. Colbert raised an eyebrow at Biden’s old-timey plea that people turn off the TV and gather around the record player and radio (“Just crank the victrola and put on the Mitch Miller!”), while he also played up his Sanders impression to mimic the senator’s clearly sore throat: “It’s imperative we overhaul health care in this country before the parasite embedded in my throat works it’s way up to my brain and starts controlling my every word!”

Colbert closed with a succinct summation of the debate, cracking, “In the end, what did we get: 10 candidates, four moderators, three hours, two languages and hopefully, one person that can beat Donald Trump.”

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