Jerry Seinfeld warmed up for his year-long Beacon Theater residency during a quick set Wednesday night on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert. His first installment in the monthly series at the Beacon begins Thursday, January 7th.
During Seinfeld’s “tight five,” he tackled American eating habits, using the larger seats at the Ed Sullivan Theater, where Late Show is hosted, as a launching point. “A lot of people think we have a weight problem in this country; I don’t agree with them,” Seinfeld begins. “I don’t believe we’ll have a weight problem until we’re all physically touching each other all the time.”
Next, he pokes fun at the “horrible little snack” of donut holes. “If you want a donut, eat a donut. Why are you eating the hole?” Later, he analyzes the experience of eating at a buffet (“People build these death row wish lists. It’s like a working model of all their emotional issues and personal needs”) and the Swanson Hungry Man TV dinner, “a little taste of prison right there in your own home.”
During his sit-down interview with Colbert, Seinfeld talked politics and why he chose the Beacon with the host. After making fun of Rand Paul’s hair, Seinfeld pointed out how “the idea that anybody thinks they could be president” is essentially crazy. On the topic of the Beacon, Seinfeld commended the theater and old vaudeville house for how it still feels like a real theater. Colbert added that Seinfeld could play anywhere he wanted, even the International Space Station. “The Space Station is not a good place for comedy,” the stand-up comic added.