Stephen Colbert upped the ante on podcast host Joe Rogan’s attempt to host a presidential debate, setting up some exciting parameters of his own for a face-off between President Donald Trump and Joe Biden on The Late Show.
Last week on Rogan’s podcast, he and MMA fighter Tim Kennedy discussed the possibility of a Rogan-moderated debate. Afterward, Kennedy asked Twitter who wanted this four-hour debate with no live audience, and Trump — who seems to believe the debates are the prime place for Biden a gaffe, or at least an opportunity to baselessly accuse him of using performance-enhancing drugs — enthusiastically responded with, “I do!”
“Don’t get your hopes up, Rogan,” Colbert cracked. “Trump has a long record of not meaning it when he says, ‘I do.’”
Colbert also joked that it was “about damn time that we had a debate moderated by the former host of Fear Factor. ‘Gentlemen, you’ve got three minutes to outline your plan for comprehensive infrastructure reform while you eat donkey testicles.’”
Not willing to let a golden opportunity slip away, Colbert pitched his idea for a Late Show-style debate between Trump and Biden. One potential format, he joked, would be eight hours in a locked room with no cameras or crowds, just “one boardwalk caricature artist” and the “winner’s whichever candidate has the biggest head.”
Alternately, Colbert offered, “I’m talking one stage, one podium, on wheels, zips back and forth, two competitors, two shields, one man has a sword, the other one has a net and a trident, one hungry lion, in a colosseum, each man will get 30 minutes to make one meal from the ingredients found in our mystery basket!”