Alec Baldwin’s President Trump spends a paranoid night in Argentina during the cold open for Saturday Night Live‘s first December episode. The commander-in-chief, sulking about the Mueller investigation on his hotel balcony, consults former lawyer Michael Cohen (Ben Stiller), a shirtless Vladimir Putin (Beck Bennett), the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia (Fred Armisen), current attorney Rudy Giuliani (Kate McKinnon) and wife Melania (Cecily Strong) – none of whom ease his legal concerns.
The clip opens with Trump recounting a bad dream. “Melania, I’m having trouble sleeping,” he says. “I keep having this nightmare where I’m walking through a forest of blood … I just can’t stop thinking about this Mueller investigation. Sometimes it almost feels like he’s coming after me.” But she tells her husband not to worry: “Worst-case scenario,” she says, “you’ll go to prison and transfer your money to me for safe keeping.”
Giuliani then wanders into the frame, with Trump asking for updates on the investigation. The good news, the attorney notes, is that “it’s almost over.” The bad news: “it’s almost over.” The president also inquires about the status of his overall legal defense, with Giuliani admitting, “I’m involved, so not great. This might be the first time someone’s lawyer pleads insanity.”
Trump calls Cohen on his cell phone, telling the attorney that he views him as a son and hates to see him head to prison. “Then why’d you make do so much illegal stuff?” Cohen asks. “Because you were like a son to me,” Trump fires back, adding that he hasn’t “been this upset since [he] flipped out over that parking space” – a wink to a real-life incident from November in which Baldwin was accused of striking a man during an altercation.
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Putin and the Crown Prince wander out on the balcony, exchanging intricate handshakes and joyously reminiscing about riding dune buggies – a send-up of the duo’s friendly greeting at the G20 Summit. “I was like, ‘Did you really kill that journalist?'” Putin says to MBS, who replies, “‘I was like, of course I didn’t – on opposite day!'”
The sketch concludes with everyone back on the balcony, joining for a Trump-themed version of Julie Covington’s “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina.”