Trevor Noah previewed what’s expected to be one of the most difficult weeks of the COVID-19 pandemic in the United States — and got some truly terrible advice from his correspondents on how to make a homemade face mask — on The Daily Social Distancing Show Monday.
The show opened with Noah highlighting Surgeon General Jerome Adams’ warning that Americans need to brace for a “Pearl Harbor” moment. Despite that warning, many are still refusing to adhere to social distancing rules, whether that means taking advantage of good weather or going to church services over the weekend. Noah showed a CNN clip of a woman leaving a church in Ohio, claiming she wasn’t worried about getting sick or getting others sick because she was “covered in Jesus’ blood.”
“Just because Jesus is on your side doesn’t mean you can’t get sick,” Noah joked. “Don’t forget, Jesus was on Jesus’ side and he died. Yeah, he came back, but that was like a one-time thing. I think it was like Mario Bros lives. Maybe he’s got two left.”
Later, Noah highlighted President Donald Trump’s decision to personally rebuff new CDC guidelines that everyone wear face masks in public to help contain the spread of the virus. Noah said he wasn’t surprised that the image-obsessed Trump wouldn’t wear a mask, but suggested his aides could trick him into doing so by telling him, “It’s not a mask, it’s a border wall for your face.”
Eager to do his part to flatten the curve, Noah set about trying to make his own mask, but a knife mishap left him with a bandaged and bloody hand and forced him to call his Daily Show correspondents for help.
First up, Jaboukie Young-White tried to show Noah how to make a mask by cutting up his T-shirts, although it turned out to just be a ploy to get the host to destroy his wardrobe. “I never liked those shirts, Trevor; they don’t look good on you,” Young-White deadpanned. “You gotta be looking crisp, Trevor!”
Dulcé Sloan wasn’t much help either; she decided to go mask-less and try to trick the virus with a shirt that proclaims, “I Already Have Corona.” When Noah countered that the virus can’t read, Sloan shot back, “We don’t know anything about this virus — this bitch could have a Masters, we don’t know!”
Finally, Noah turned to Michael Costa, who proudly told Noah he’d bypassed mask-making entirely by just cutting some eyeholes in a pillowcase. Of course, the moment he put on his DIY creation, he realized he’d accidentally made Klan hood.