Samantha Bee’s Full Frontal released the extended version of Will Ferrell‘s riotous speech as former President George W. Bush from their “Not the White House Correspondents Dinner” special, which aired last month.
In the extended version, Ferrell’s Dubya talks up his presidency’s rosy new tint in light of President Trump’s already disastrous tenure. “I needed eight years, a catastrophic flood, a war built on a lie, an economic disaster – the new guy needed 100 days,” “Bush” drawled. “He’s now widely considered the worst president of all time; I come in second. I’m fine by that, no one remembers second place … I am the Martin Van Buren of the 21st century.”
“Bush” also joked about how he handled his own contentious relationship with the press and busted Trump for being a “snowflake” and jetting down to Mar-A-Lago to escape the pressure. But the ex-president also had a few extra burns for journalists and the media.
“I don’t know why anyone would become a journalist now – it’s like being on the Titanic in this room,” joked “Bush.” “Washington Post, New York Times, Boston Herald – the iceberg is coming, and you guys are hanging on to your journalistic integrity, playing the violin as the ship goes down. You should do what they’re doing over at Fox and Friends: Those guys are dressing up like women and children and stealing the lifeboats.”
To close, Dubya discussed his second act as a painter, revealing that along with a paint-by-numbers portrait of the president, he was also working on paintings of Trump’s cabinet. Bush noted, however, that he had hit a major roadblock: “I traveled to all the Hobby Lobbys in Texas, Eastern New Mexico, the panhandle of Oklahoma and I still could not get my hands on enough white paint.”