Late-night hosts from Stephen Colbert and Seth Meyers to Trevor Noah and Samantha Bee gleefully dissected the first day of public hearings in the impeachment inquiry into President Donald Trump on their respective shows Wednesday night.
On The Late Show, Colbert called the hearings “the biggest ratings hit for C-SPAN 3 since Drunk History starring Brett Kavanaugh,” and focused on the bombshell testimony from U.S. ambassador to Ukraine, Bill Taylor. Taylor said that one of his colleagues overheard Trump asking E.U. ambassador Gordon Sondland about Ukraine’s investigations into Joe Biden, adding that when the staffer asked Sondland what Trump thought about Ukraine, Sondland allegedly replied that Trump cared “more about the investigations of Biden.”
Colbert then deadpanned, “He also emphasized that Trump cared more about the investigations of Biden than he did about his son, Eric, who the president described as, ‘The Teeth One.'”
On Full Frontal, Bee highlighted this moment as well, although noted that it maybe wasn’t as big a bombshell as it seemed — considering Trump publicly said in September that he discussed an investigation into Biden with Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky. “This is what these hearings are going to be like all the way through,” Bee cracked. “Every bombshell will just be confirming things we already know. It will be like, instead of a secret taping operation, Nixon had a TikTok.”
Seth Meyers on Late Night also emphasized that Trump, his administration and his personal lawyer have done little to deny the president was pressuring Ukraine for an investigation. As such, Republicans during the hearing yesterday didn’t try to defend Trump, but downplay and distract from the mounting evidence.
For example, Devin Nunes, the top Republican on the House Intelligence Committee, spouted off a bunch of conspiracy theories during his opening statement, including one that the Democrats had allegedly tried “to obtain nude pictures of Trump from Russian pranksters.”
In turn, Meyers quipped: “Hey man, I guarantee you, no one wants nude pics of Donald Trump. I’m not crazy about clothed pics of Donald Trump. Also I have to believe that if there were nude pics of Donald Trump, the first person to show us would be Donald Trump.”
On The Daily Show, Trevor Noah focused on another floundering GOP rep, Jim Jordan of Ohio, who tried to turn the focus of the hearing to “the guy who started it all, the whistleblower.” Vermont representative Peter Welch then told Jordan the democrats would be happy to have the “the person who started it all come in and testify: President Trump is welcome to take a seat right there.”
The moment prompted Noah to admit, “You know, by Congress’ standards, that was a pretty good slam. The only way it could’ve been better was if the congressman was like, ‘Seriously, President Trump is welcome any time, in fact I’ve got his invite right here…'” Noah then reached into his jacket and pulled out a middle finger, then dabbed for good measure.