The Ballad of Mike Love
At the same time, however, Love is considered one of the biggest assholes in the history of rock & roll. That’s been the popular opinion of him for several decades. He just can’t seem to shake it. There are “I Hate Mike Love” websites and a “Mike Love Is a Douchebag” group on Facebook. He’s been called a clown, the Devil, an evil, egotistical prick, a greedy bully, sarcastic and mean-spirited, and, let’s not forget, “if he were a fish, he’d be a plastic bag wrapped around the neck of a beautiful sea lion.” Love is mostly able to laugh off this hateful venom, but on occasion he will break down, turn to his wife of 21 years, Jackie, and ask her, “What did I do? Why am I the villain? How did it get to this?”
According to his detractors, it all started in 1966, in a recording studio, with Love expressing his dislike for Brian’s work on what became Pet Sounds, one of the greatest albums of all time. “Who’s gonna hear this shit? The ears of a dog?” he is said to have said, though he strongly denies it. A year later, he supposedly so criticized the Smile project that Brian, that beautiful sea lion of a man, shelved it for 37 years. He has sued or threatened to sue Brian numerous times. Plus, in the 1970s, he used to wear gold-lamé bell-bottoms that were so tight that his (somewhat enviable) package seemed to have equal billing with everyone else. He made the insipid 1988 song “Kokomo,” which Brian doesn’t appear on and that has become the biggest-selling Beach Boys tune of all time, Love so proud of lyrics like “Aruba, Jamaica, ooh, I wanna take ya.” He coughed up $5,000 in seed money so Tipper Gore could start her campaign to censor music. And then there’s the baseball cap he wears everyplace he goes, onstage or not. It’s universally despised. Even wife Jackie isn’t a fan. (“When we go out on dates, I always ask, ‘Can you leave the hat at home?'”) Everybody knows he’s bald. He should embrace it.
He’s wearing one today. He steps out of the closet and plucks it off his head. He bends forward. “Yeah, well,” he says. “You really don’t want to blind oncoming traffic, OK?” And back on it goes.
So, he’s got his reasons for the cap, as well as for most everything else, a good bit of which, he says, is just plain flat-out wrong. “The fable is that I’m such an asshole, but a lot of that stuff is skewed by the crazies,” he says. “I never said half the shit that’s attributed to me. I mean, I must be pretty prolific in asshole-type things to say, like, I get up in the morning thinking, ‘I’ve got a job to do. How can I be a total jerk today?'” Later, he says, “I’ve become cannon fodder.” He pauses and grins. He could pull back, or continue a serious discussion of how he has been pilloried and why it’s so off-base, maybe even apologize for some of the things he’s said. But such, apparently, is not his way. “It’s o-pun season,” he says, making a pun for pun’s sake, with little regard for how it might sound to those around him.
