Looking Back in Anger: 101 Things Noel Gallagher Has Been Mad At

Noel Gallagher is an easy target, if only because he gleefully takes aim at just about everything in his sights. In recent years, he’s pointed his abrasive Mancunian accent at Jay Z, The X Factor and, most famously, his own brother, Oasis frontman Liam. Scroll through enough of his soundbites and it’ll dawn on you like a champagne supernova: This isn’t a schtick. But taken as a whole, the following collection also reveals a sensitivity that belies much of Gallagher’s couldn’t-give-a-fook bravado. He cuts himself down nearly as often as he does others, and he congratulates those of his victims who show they’re in on the joke. Decades of bad behavior have prompted public apologies and begged the question, why do we keep asking Noel Gallagher what he thinks? But the answer is simple: Because unlike so many others in the industry he loves to cut down, he remains totally honest.

1. His Bandmates
“I spent 20 years in a band making records by committee. I’m fucked if I’m going to do that now. I think Oasis was at its best when I was solely in charge, anyway.” –Rolling Stone, Feb. 2015

2. His Wife’s Remodeling Plans
“[My new album’s] about me and Sara moving house, and we need a new kitchen. And as you know my wife, the kitchen will probably [have] flown in some Egyptian marble from the Great Pyramid at Giza.” –BBC Radio 2, Feb. 2015

3. His Wife’s Artistic Feedback
“I’ve given up playing my wife music because she’ll just go ‘It’s OK. It’s good. That’s nice. It’s nice.'” –Wall Street Journal, Feb. 2015

4. Brian Wilson
“Who would want to be Brian Wilson, sitting in a studio in a nappy, eating a fucking carrot with your little fat feet in a sandpit, not going on tour? Fuck that.” –RS, Feb. 2015

5. One Direction
“Fucking idiots… They’re all winning. No one’s losing! The only people who are losing are idiots like me at 9.30 in the morning when you’re trying to get the kids out the door for school, and they’re fucking murdering one of Blondie’s songs.” –GQ (U.K.), Oct. 2013

6. The X Factor
“There’s a boy band with eight lads in it. You cannot get eight people to sing in tune, live. It is impossible. If the Beach Boys couldn’t do it, no one’s doing it. And there they are, miming their little hearts out to a Snow Patrol cover. Honestly, I have a vein in the side of my neck that jumps out about four inches.” –BBC Radio 2, Feb. 2015

7. Being Reduced to Mild Trashing…
“We used to proper fucking wreck things man. It was total destruction. But we’ve grown up now. It’s just mild trashing now.” –1998 TV Interview

8. …And Becoming a “Pussy”
“When you’re 24 in the biggest band in the world, I’m sure you can work out all the nonsense that entails. When you’re a 47-year-old solo artist, it’s different. You become a fucking pussy, is what happens.” –RS, Feb. 2015

9. Ed Sheeran Headlining Wembley
“I don’t think I can live in a world where that’s even possible. When you hear that kind of polished pop and then there’s a ginger guy with a fucking guitar it seems subversive, but it’s fucking not.” –NME, Jan. 2015

10. Health Care
“Why would you check into a hospital to pay somebody four grand an hour to tell your things that really you should already know about yourself?… Give me the money. I’ll sort it out for you.” –Video Interview