Beavis and Butthead would be all over this. Rock legends Metallica want to throw a great big party, stage a free concert and treat all their fans to something special. Trouble is, they’re all revved up with no place to go.
As drummer Lars Ulrich explained to Reuters: “We’ve been turned down by some of the finest municipalities in the country…”
Unfazed by this minor setback, Metallica is looking to its fans for support. Anyone who knows of a large parcel of land that is, according to the band, “large enough and fan-friendly enough to accommodate all the diverse Metallica loyalists hungering for this one-of-a-kind event,” should contact Metallica immediately at (800) 804-1400 or send e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org.