Scarlett, who has long been challenging Jude to take over as the patron saint of lost causes, invites Sean to the Bluebird to hear Deacon perform. Naturally, he’s reluctant, and not just because there’s a per-seat minimum. The next day, he has not only washed Scarlett’s blanket, he offers to go see Deacon, unaware that he’s already missed the show. Not to worry, there’s another show that she can get them into, even though it is sold out. From the look on his face, you can tell those last two words are as scary as the words “tax audit” to most people. He shows up that night, drunk, on edge and dangerously close to getting a “Shhhhh…” from the Bluebird staff. But instead of screaming “Free Bird!” at the top of his lungs and getting his ass kicked all the way out to the middle of Hillsboro Road, he rushes outside with Scarlett following close behind, attempting to calm him down. Scarlett tries to reason with him, telling him that in spite of the horrific things he has witnessed and experienced in war, he doesn’t have to feel like he’s the only one who has had to deal with something terrible. “You don’t got to get shot at to feel like the world’s closin’ in on you,” she tells him, in her own special Scarlett way. “It’s hard to be a person… without ever having been shot at.” We know what she means, because everyone’s definitely dealing with some kind of shit that we wouldn’t want to, but just for the record, we’re definitely in the prefer-not-getting-shot-at camp. The next day, Sean invites her to the horse barn where he sings a gorgeous song about bringing him an angel. Scarlett, who doesn’t know when to just nod and say, “That’s nice, bless your heart,” tells him a whole lot of people out there will want to hear what she just did… and that even though he’s not sure he can do it, he doesn’t really have a choice.
Daphne, who tells her dad she wants to make an EP, doesn’t get the reaction she’d hoped for, so it’s no surprise she secretly auditions to be “Nashville’s Next Country Star,” something Deacon wouldn’t necessarily want her to do even if Jessie’s scummy ex, Brad, wasn’t involved. She breaks the news to Deacon and Maddie and things go slightly ballistic, but she and Deacon eventually hug it out and he agrees to let her do it. She makes it to the top three in the competition.
Jake breaks the news to his mom that Brad is shipping him off to boarding school. Deacon offers to intervene, but, wisely, Jessie discourages that idea. Jessie bursts into Brad’s office and they argue, during which he calls her the “Apache helicopter” of parents. This from the “Tsar Bomba” of fathers. (Scary fact:
Avery, meanwhile, has taken off his wedding ring and is giving up on Juliette returning to him and their daughter. While he and Alannah have a talk about their respective relationship difficulties, the sexual tension between the two of them is rapidly reaching code-red levels. The smoldering glances between the two could set off the smoke detector on the tour bus.
Gunnar, however, is too busy to notice all of that so far because of Will and the increasingly off-the-rails behavior that has him about one step away from becoming a beefy Marvel movie villain. His first mistake (well, if you don’t count injecting steroids) is attempting to diagnose his low-grade fever and other symptoms on the Internet. When the band, which finally has a name,
, gets invited on ABC’s daytime food fest The Chew, Alannah has been promised the lead vocals on both songs they will be performing. She declines, but Will is already pissed. By the time the group takes the stage, Will is so feverish he imagines he’s Jimi Hendrix on the brown acid at