The British-Irish boy band One Direction finished third on the seventh season of the U.K. talent show The X Factor, and took home the gold in the 2012 Hair-Moussing Olympiad. For would-be tween heartthrobs, that’s a fine start, and the 13 songs on their debut – including the chugging powerpop hit “What Makes You Beautiful” – are engineered by a cast of international songwriting and production heavies (RedOne, Kelly Clarkson) for optimal radio-readiness. But whereas Justin Bieber has charm, that telltale scratchy vocal tone and actual charisma, One Direction are simply five pretty guys with a few decent songs and not much personality. Call them One Dimension.
Listen To One Direction’s “Tell Me a Lie”: