Three Nevada guys — 18 and horny. Stolen money. 1962. Marilyn Monroe. You expect little from a comedy that combines those elements, and “Calendar Girl” delivers. Jason Priestley, the likable star of TV’s Beverly Hills, 90210, stars as Roy Darpinian, a Fonz type in speech and manner, which can probably be traced to screenwriter Paul W. Shapiro’s early experiences doing scripts on spec for Happy Days. Roy lusts for a date with MM before shipping out for the Army. Heading for L.A. with money lifted from his loan-shark bosses, Roy drags along his two buds — nerdy Ned (Gabriel Olds) and nervous Scott (Jerry O’Connell). They don’t think Roy has a chance (“You have no brains, and you fart”).
Ninety laugh-free minutes later, Monroe (Stephanie Anderson) has changed each boy’s life in singularly unexciting ways. Director John Whitesell tries to compensate with titillation — Priestley even shows his buns on a nude beach — but Calendar Girl is clearly waiting to catch the next ride to video oblivion.