Portman opened the bit with a clap back at one user’s rude assumptions about her eating habits, while Gosling smirked off the backhanded compliment, “Oh look at me … I’m Ryan Gosling, I have perfect bone structure and kind eyes. Go fuck yourself Ryan Gosling.”
Elsewhere, Samuel L. Jackson copped to having “resting fart face” while Lin-Manuel Miranda giggled through a potent burn: “Lin-Manuel Miranda looks like he’s getting a 1996 NBC sitcom with his haircut.” Casey Affleck also seemed hardly phased by a tweet that compared him to Billy Bob Thornton’s character in Sling Blade, while Miles Teller even agreed with the insult leveled at him: “Miles Teller has the face of a guy who would request ‘Gangnam Style’ at a wedding where he doesn’t know either the bride or groom.”
Other highlights included the miffed rebuttals from Robert De Niro and Emma Stone, though Tilda Swinton stole the bit with a dead-eyed reading of a tweet that compared her to a tiny, fluffy dog.
From game changing wins to even more historic screw-ups, the good, the bad and the WTFugly of that unbelievable Academy Awards ceremony.