Move over Krampus, there’s a new harbinger of holiday misery in town: While Hollywood celebrates its award-season peak, Peter Travers and his trusty scum bucket have returned to distribute heaps of coal to all the bad boys and girls responsible for these 10 terrible 2014 films.
First up, God’s Not Dead, the worst of a new wave of awful Christian films that have been made this year, followed by the remake of Annie. After seeing the latter, Travers remembers hearing a little girl pointedly ask, “What have they done to the Annie music, mommy?!”
Travers rids himself of the next three films as quickly as possible, starting with the confusing sci-fi flop, Transcendence, then the crummy adaptation of the young adult hit Divergent and finally the protracted, cornball dud, The Judge. Web-slinging into the Number Five spot is The Amazing Spider-Man 2, which somehow manages to be even worse than its remarkably terrible predecessor, The Amazing Spider-Man.
The cantankerous diatribe about the dangers of the Internet that is Men, Women &Children gets discarded next with Travers saying the movie was akin to “a sermon you wanted to put a paper bag over your head while you were hearing it.” The lumbering Godzilla reboot kicks off the final three, followed by The Expendables 3, which Travers calls a prime example of the worst Hollywood can do: “It is just horrendous to watch,” he says. “It’s people we once liked, making us hate them!”
But Sylvester Stallone’s latest bust is no match for Transformers: Age of Extinction, the latest hulking piece of metallic crap from Michael Bay, who once again plays Sauron to Travers’ Gandalf. “This has desperation all over it,” Travers says. “Michael Bay, you are the very worst ever, and Transformers: Age of Extinction is not just the worst movie of 2014, but the worst movie of your entire career. And that’s saying something.”