There’s no scum more heinous than sticky summer scum, but intrepid film critic Peter Travers isn’t afraid of a little dirty work. With Labor Day just around the corner, it’s time to break out the bucket and countdown the worst summer movies of 2013.
Travers kicks off the countdown with The Mortal Instruments, an overpriced attempt to be the next Twilight, followed by Lindsay Lohan’s latest effort, The Canyons: “Nobody that said they liked this is telling the truth,” Travers scowls, though he does give Lohan props for her acting.
Coming in at number eight is Jennifer Anniston and Jason Sudeikis’ mind-numbing hit We’re the Millers; at number six is Baz Luhrmann’s “nauseating” The Great Gatsby, a film so crummy not even its stellar cast could garner praise from Travers. Speaking of ensemble casts, the Adam Sandler and friends goof fest Grown Ups 2 kicks off the top five, followed at number four by the box office flop, White House Down. “Did the president like it?” Travers snarks. “I mean there was no request that it was shown at Camp David. There should be no request ever that anyone sees White House Down again!”
And now, as Travers says, it’s time for the “crème of the worst, the garbage with the hugest stink on it.” At number three there’s The Hangover Part III, which didn’t even come close to recapturing the glory of the first film. While Travers says his number one and two are practically interchangeable, for the sake of the countdown, number two is the slogging and dull The Lone Ranger, while the venerable distinction of worst movie of the summer goes to none other than M. Night Shyamalan’s sci-fi fiasco After Earth. “It’s the perfect example of a bad summer movie,” says Travers, “because everything in it should’ve been great, and everything in it is. . .”
You guessed it – total scum.