Based on its title, you might not realize that Unhung Hero is a documentary. You might think that it’s a hokey comedy about a dude with a small dick. And in that case, you’re half right – Patrick Moote suffered one of life’s greatest embarrassments when his marriage proposal was rejected and the video went viral. Then came the reason: his girlfriend rejected him because of his miniscule penis. Rather than suffer the fate of the Gods, Moote linked up with documentarian Brian Spitz to find out if, in the end, size really matters. Rolling Stone sat down with the man at the center of these problems to discuss his love life and if the porn offers have started rolling in yet.
Your original proposal video had over ten million YouTube hits. But you had no idea there was something amiss in your relationship?
I did. You can tell when, sexually, you’re getting somebody’s motor running or not. I felt like I wasn’t – but I didn’t think she would run out, either. Apparently some of the things that I wasn’t realizing were a bigger problem than I knew about.
Has she gotten beaten up over this?
She hasn’t so far, and I hope that doesn’t happen, because that really wasn’t the point. It was more to investigate this insecurity in me. The problem wasn’t really with her. The problem was with me.
Have you had women tell you that they totally understand her decision?
Oh yeah. You either get, “Oh my God, no! That would never be a problem,” or “Oh yeah. Big time. That’s a big problem.” It’s almost fifty-fifty.
If the roles were reversed, though, you would have been vilified.
Oh my God. Absolutely. You would be chased out of town with pitchforks.
So why does society think it’s okay to be the other way around?
A lot of times when people talk about it, they just assume that everyone is joking. Like, “Oh, what does he have, a little penis? Haha.” In reality, someone might be in their head thinking, “Yeah, he did. It was awful.” I also think that because women have been objectified for so long – and have been put under that microscope for so long – to come out and say something like, “I would never marry her because her boobs are too small” absolutely makes you look like an asshole. No matter what way you cut it. Whereas if a girl says, “I think his penis is a little to small,” people think, “Oh my God. She’s so bold for saying that! Look at her!”
Which is true. When people ask what I want to come from the film, I really want people to talk about it. I think it defuses the whole thing and, pretty soon, it can be one of those things where a girl can say, “Yeah, he had a small penis,” and people can be like, “Really, Jan? Really? It’s 2025! I thought we were past that.”
Tell me about the decision to not show your penis.
The director is a good buddy of mine, and he would always gingerly bring it up. He’d say, “So, I was thinking about a couple things. . .” and he’d tell me three things and then he’d talk about that. I was never opposed and, honestly, my penis ends up on camera a lot just because of the situations that we were in.
More than that, I was surprised that you didn’t say how small it is.
I did a lot of measuring, and anyone who’s done it enough knows that there’s anywhere from an 1/8 to 1/4-inch fluctuation on any given day. It’s such a fickle creature. But if you were to say that the average penis is around five-and-a-half inches, I’m below average.
Do you have more or less trouble with women now?
It’s starting to become a thing. I’m starting to get things on Twitter like, “Oh my God. You must be doing so well with the ladies!” Not particularly, but I’m interested to see what the reaction is as we continue. I feel like girls are either going to feel really sorry for me, like I’m their little brother, or they’re going to be intensely curious about what’s going on.
You meet Jonah Falcon (who has the world’s largest penis) in the film, and he comes off as a strange guy in his interviews.
Just like anybody else, he’s got his insecurities. Once the focus is all about your penis, what effect does that have on your personality? But some of the stuff he says in the film is poignant, too. When he says, “People say, ‘If I had what you have. . .'” What? What would be different? You’d be you, except you have a bigger penis. And that’s what the film is about. You’d find something else to focus on and make yourself miserable. Sooner or later, you’re getting hair plugs and calf implants. Then you’ll be insecure about that.
And I think that comes across well.
I didn’t expect to ever get rich from this and I didn’t expect people to walk out of the theater and say, “My life is different now!” But if people respond to it and connect to it and connect to what I’m going through, that’s awesome. What’s been really cool is how many people relate to it in totally un-penis-related ways, especially in the lesbian community. After some screenings, people told me they relate to it but never had a penis, or seen a penis, or even given two shits about a penis. But they get it. They understand. Maybe when they were younger they felt like they didn’t fit what everybody wanted them to be. And as soon as they accepted the fact that they are who they are, their life changed astronomically. I love that. I love that it’s not just guys with little wieners coming up to me afterwards having a big pity party. It’s everybody.
So have you gotten any porn offers?
I haven’t and I wouldn’t do it. I don’t want to make that the focus. Not that I haven’t thought of doing porn, but listen, I have enough trouble when the lights are off in the room by myself. Throw in lights and cameras and other people in there and I’d just be giggling nervously.