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Box-Office Bitching

Dudes, while you were partying and watching the Giants drink the Patriots milkshake, chick flicks took over the weekend box-office.

Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus Rip You Off in 3D or whatever the hell this concert flick is called pulled in $29 million (the highest Super Bowl weekend gross ever, sinking even Titanic) in just such 683 theaters. Disney honchos, who produced the film in-house for $7 million in chump change, quickly decided to extend the one-week engagement to however long they can drag the little girls in. Depressed yet?

Jessica Alba came in next, hoisting $13 million for The Eye, a horrorshow in every way except for the horror which is PG-13 rated for wimps.

Next, Katherine Heigl pulled her weight in chick flick gold by adding $8.4 million to the 27 Dresses pot of gold, now totaling $57.1 million. If only the movie didn’t fall on the dark sight of bearable.

Hanging in for No. 4 was Juno, the Oscar nominated teen pregnancy juggernaut which added another $7.4 million to the till in its 9th week. Total so far: $110.3 million. That aint fo’shizz.

All that estrogen left the macho flicks — Meet the Spartans and Rambo — free-falling by more than sixty percent. You can’t blame those flameouts entirely on the Super Bowl.

Good News: Eva Longoria Parker’s career-crushing ghost comedy, Over Her Dead Body, was barely visible at the box-office with a paltry $4.6 million.

Bad News: This weekend brings Fool’s Gold, with Kate Hudson emasculating Matthew McConaughey for laughs that never come in what looks like No. 1 for sure.

Disclaimer from me: I’ve got nothing against chick comedies. Juno is primo. But what was the last really good one? Maybe The Devil Wears Prada? If I’m wrong, enlighten me.


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