The Women of 'Mad Men'

For these gals, 1968's been a year packed with tumultuous surprises

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Frank Ockenfels/AMC13/13


Remember when Megan was smart – like, the smartest person on the show? Remember when she had ideas, opinions and spoke entire sentences at a time? Remember when she said "It's just a milkshake," and the entire Draper family (along with the Mad Men audience) had a lightbulb moment of "Wow, some people are sane! Bring on the future"? Yeah well, ever since she quit the firm, her brain has been gathering dust in the closet, right next to the foxy green raincoat she wore her last day in the office. She's turned into the Hot Chick Who Mopes Around The Apartment. I think she's made it all the way down to the lobby 3 or 4 times all season. When she gets really wild, she ventures as far as the balcony, wearing her special "moping on the balcony" panties.

Her life has gotten so insanely dull that Mad Men fans are forced to make up wacko theories to explain what happened and how she got replaced by the Megandroid. It's like the scene in Desperately Seeking Susan when Madonna reads the diary of suburban housewife Rosanna Arquette and decides it's in code: "It's got to be a cover. Nobody's life could be this boring!"

Where did Megan's spark go? Who took the "zou" from the "zou bisou bisou"? As soon as she quit her day job, halfway through Season Five, she started spending all her time sniffling on the carpet, with her haunted eyes asking, "Callice, how am I not famous yet?" Despite her sporadically mentioned soap-opera gig, she's even blanker now than when she was unemployed. And despite her superb taste in "minidresses you wear to go to third base with producers while leaving the door unlocked so your bratty stepchildren can get murdered," she's turned into a ticking time bomb of feminist fury, waiting to go off. Free Megan!