The Dallas Cowboys have added a new weapon to their roster just in time for the postseason.
Even though he retired from the world of wrestling earlier this year, it didn’t take long for WWE Hall of Famer Sting to score a gig as a comedi – err, Intimidation Coach. In a short video posted by the Cowboys on Twitter, Sting explained how boredom began to set in shortly after he became a retired man and that an opening as an intimidation coach with his favorite football team caught his eye. He “applied” for the job and got the call shortly thereafter.
“So yeah, I retired earlier this year and I’m kinda laying low,” Sting says. “Not a whole lot going on. Boredom sets in, and I’m a huge Dallas Cowboys fan. I heard they were looking for an intimidation coach, so – shot in the dark, I know – I applied for the job and I got it.”
If you’re wondering what Sting does as an intimidation coach, it involves taking his trademark bat everywhere he goes, complaining about there not being any French Vanilla syrup at the coffee bar, convincing older employees he’s not the man behind “Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic” and showing the likes of Ezekiel Elliott how face paint can take his game to the next level. He also keeps a close eye on everyone’s diet to make sure they’re at peak performance.
You know, all the little things NFL teams are missing these days.