Don‘t Wait for ’When’ — Experience Joy Now

Years ago, my great-grandfather had a foundry. One of the items they made for a particular client was custom ravioli plates for a local shop in New York. Their client, the local shop owner, had taken great risk in commissioning the ravioli plates. Would they even sell? It turns out, they didn’t.

One day, the shop owner called my great-grandfather saying he’d fallen on hard times and couldn’t pay his debt of $1,000. Instead, the shop owner offered that my great-grandfather take $1,000 worth of merchandise from the storeowner’s shop. He accepted and went to the store, browsing until he picked an old, wooden bocce set, priced at $60. The bocce set held a lot of sentimental value, reminding him of his days playing bocce as a kid back in Italy.

When he told the shop owner the bocce set was what he wanted, the owner commented that it was only $60 and that he owed my great-grandfather over $1,000. At that moment, my great-grandfather showed distinguished compassion. Instead of being spiteful about the money he was owed, he chose to honor the courage and integrity it took the shop owner just to pick up the phone.

After my great-grandfather brought the set back to his home, my uncle kept encouraging him to build a bocce court in their backyard. But my great-grandfather said he would build it when he grew old, despite being in his 60s at the time. Over the years my uncle kept asking him to build that court, but my great-grandfather kept replying he would when he was old. But that bocce court was never built. That “when” never came.

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Sound familiar to anyone? How often in life do we convince ourselves to forgo something great in the present in the hopes of something better in the future?

“I’ll be happy when…” 

“I’ll build that bocce court when…” 

“I’ll take that trip when…” 

The problem with this thinking is twofold: 

1. “When” is a moving target. When you set a goal far down the road, odds are, once you reach that point, you’ll move the target further down the road.

2. Most people never get to that “when.” We pass away, forget or stay in a state of self-judgment, never believing we deserve whatever it is we’ve pushed off.

Now, my great-grandfather was a happy man, blessed with all the wonderful people and circumstances in life that would bring anybody fulfillment — and he had that without the bocce court. But how much more joy could he have experienced with loved ones if he’d just gone ahead and built it? How much fun and play could he have created for himself and others if he’d allowed that?

This is a reminder to find life’s miracles in the small things and be inspired to dive deeper into a life of curiosity and play. When we play, we learn. When we play, we connect. When we play, we feel joy.

What is the bocce court in your life? When have you put off — play, peace, and happiness — by convincing yourself that you’ll do it “when…”?

Don’t wait for “when.” Play, connect and experience joy now. You deserve it. Future you does too. I’ll see you on the bocce court.