Jennifer Lopez and Jimmy Fallon squared off Monday night on The Tonight Show for a title more coveted than Super Bowl MVP and Nobel Peace Prize Laureate combined: Wearer of the tightest pants.
The supremely goofy bit opens with Fallon — donning a bowl-cut wig that sits askew on his head — skipping on stage and shuffling to a tune about how he's the only one in town with tight pants on. Then, a challenger appears. Lopez, in a matching outfit, struts her own stuff, which leads to a heated exchange over tight pants stats: Everyone at the Piggly Wiggly's talking about Fallon's tight pants, while Mayor Barleycorn presented Lopez a plaque that "declared my pants the tightest in all the land." But after Fallon claims the Governor himself proclaimed Tight Pants Day in his honor, it was, as one might say, on.
"Listen up you little bitch," Lopez fires back. "You better hide your wife, you better hide your kids, because I will cut you!" Game, set and match. Though before Fallon mopes off to find a new town where he can be the tight pants king, the pair share one last exchange. "We cool-o, Papi Chulo?" asks Lopez. "I gotcha, hot Sriracha," replies a defeated Fallon.
Lopez is set to release her new album, A.K.A., on June 17th, her first full-length since 2011's Love? The pop star will also return to TV following her stint as a judge on American Idol, though this time she'll star in Shades of Blue, a scripted police drama that will air on NBC in 2015.