Melissa McCarthy reprised her instant classic impersonation of Sean Spicer on the latest episode of Saturday Night Live, recapping another crazy week in Donald Trump's White House through the words of its no-nonsense, often-nonsensical press secretary.
"First of all, I'd just like to announce I'm calm now, and I will remain calm as long as you sons of…," McCarthy said. "I'm not gonna that, because that's the old Spicey, and this is the new Spicey."
After failing to explain what extreme vetting for immigrants entering the country constitutes, a frustrated Spicey once again resorted to props to make his point.
"We know Barbie is okay because she's blonde," "Spicer" said of the TSA process. "Who's next? Uh oh, uh oh, it's Moana. Slow your role honey. Then we're gonna pat her down, and then we're gonna read her emails and if we don't like the answers – which we won't! – boom, Guantanamo Bay."
"Spicer" stated that, after Trump's executive order was struck down by a federal circuit court, the president would take the matter to People's Court, foreshadowing a sketch that arrived later in the episode.
McCarthy also teased the real Spicer about his statement regarding a nonexistent terror attack in Atlanta; the press secretary later clarified he meant Orlando.
"I said that wrong when I said it, and then you wrote it, which makes you wrong," "Spicer" said. "When I say something wrong, you guys should know what it is I'm meaning, wrong or right. You're wrong, and that's why I'm here. Obviously I meant Orlanta."
"Spicer" also blamed the press for a bunch of unreported terror attacks: The Night They Drove Ol' Dixie Down, The Horror at Six Flags, The Slaughter at Fraggle Rock and, of course, the Bowling Green Massacre. "Not the Kellyanne one, the real one," "Spicer" said, noting that massacre's creator Kellyanne Conway.
The press secretary then briefly turned C-SPAN into QVC in order to promote some of Ivanka Trump's jewelry after Nordstrom's (and others) dumped her merchandise line.
After Kate McKinnon made a creepy cameo as new attorney general Jeff Sessions, the press conference ended with Spicey assaulting reporters with a leaf blower and a newly mechanized podium.
After another successful, unannounced SNL appearance, McCarthy celebrated with her husband Ben Falcone while still in character: