7. Phil Hartman
The grown-up in the room. In the credits, he's not hanging on the street like most of the others; he's relaxing at a swank lounge with a blonde. (Hard to watch, now that we know the blonde was the real-life cokehead wife who killed him in 1998.) He was nicknamed "the Glue" for holding the show together. Chris Farley's motivational-speaker rant never could have worked without Hartman as the cool dad in chinos, keeping a straight face. No role was too small for him. He was a master at playing bitter old men; his Sinatra made Piscopo's look like a cream puff. ("I got chunks of guys like you in my stool!") But his speciality was charming assholes, from the Colon Blow ad to Bill Clinton. Oh, that smug smile when he tells the Secret Service, "There's gonna be a whole bunch of things we don't tell Mrs. Clinton."
Greatest hit: "Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer," where he sums up the classic pitch of the all-American con man: "Your world frightens and confuses me. . . . But there is one thing I do know."