11. 'The Diary'
Air Date: January 31, 2000
At the suggestion of Kim Kelly's mom, Lindsay's parents decide to read her diary in order to determine what their sweet little girl has been doing. What they find instead is Lindsay's no-holds-barred assessment of their boring existence and loveless marriage, prompting Jean to start spicing things up (first in the kitchen, then eventually the bedroom). They also forbid Lindsay from ever hanging out with Kim again, which brings her friend's insecurities to the forefront. Meanwhile, the Geeks decide that enough is enough when it comes to that legendarily horrifying practice of picking teams during gym class. So Bill places a series of prank calls to Coach Fredricks, including one hilariously pathetic onslaught of insults that includes terms like "stinky turd" and "poop head." Even funnier is Coach's attempt to catch the culprit by having every one his students read a transcript of the call. Oh, those good old pre-caller ID days.
Best Line: "Everything I do, I do to serve you. I think of you when I'm stocking fishing poles. I think of you when I'm answering questions about cross-country ski wax."