Imagine a world where teachers made LeBron money and SAT scores carried as much weight as RBIs.
It's no secret that sports play a huge part in our everyday lives, and the occasional analysis of every draft, dash, dish or drive has given way to round-the-clock coverage of stray tweets and ill-timed twitches. But what if we turned that 24-hour news cycle toward something that actually mattered, like teaching?
Well, Key and Peele are glad you asked. Because Comedy Central's dynamic duo have done just that.
In their new TeachingCenter sketch, they poke fun at our endless obsession with sports by creating their own SportsCenter for education. From teachers signing $80 million guaranteed contracts with $40 million incentives based on test scores – told you the SAT was important – to muscled-up highlights of American History class and hyperbolic coverage of the Teacher Draft (complete with scouting reports and a ticker to update you on the best ACT scores), the duo put a hilarious spin on ESPN's signature show.
"Mike Yoast is an unbelievable story," Jordan Peele says of the first teacher taken in the 2015 Draft. "His father living from paycheck-to-paycheck as a humble pro football player, the kid was a natural mathlete."
"You know he's gonna buy his mom a house!" Keegan-Michael Key chuckles.
Of course, with the average public school teacher making less than $50,000 a year, part of the reason they're laughing is to keep from crying. And while it's sad that the end is near for Key & Peele, based on this sketch (and others), they've got a bright future at ESPN if they choose to focus on sports next. We'd love to see them cover the Scripps National Spelling Bee.