Jay Cutler has already made life miserable for Chicago Bears fans – now he's ruining their afterlives, too.
With his sideline sulking and penchant for slinging pick-sixes, Cutler has long been a source of frustration in Chicago – and will probably continue to be now that he's locked up until 2020 – but this might just mark his lowest point yet. Now Bears fans are taking shots at him in their obituaries.
Earlier this month, Northbrook, Illinois resident Elizabeth Porter Bowman died at the age of 78, but she managed to get in one final shot at Cutler in her obit, which was published in the Chicago Tribune. In it, after rattling off her favorite sports teams (the Cubs, Blackhawks and Bears), her obituary makes it apparent that she never supported Cutler. Why, exactly? It doesn't say, but that, along with the fact that not a single other Chicago athlete – not even Derrick Rose – is called out for failing to meet her expectations only makes it funnier.
"Betsy was an elementary school teacher and later a tutor, but her passion and focus was being a dedicated and involved mother and grandmother. She was a woman of loyalty, integrity, opinion, curiosity and intelligence. A lifelong fan of the Cubs, Blackhawks and Bears (except Jay Cutler)."
Ice cold. Of course, Jay's probably used to this kind of thing by now; how else can you explain why he usually looks like this? Is spending time with Kristin Cavallari really that depressing? Wait, don't answer that.