Because seven American Idol audition episodes weren’t painful enough, producers treated us to a “best of the rest” show that featured a strip-tease, a contestant with potty mouth, a guy named Chikezie and a handful of clips aimed at pulling back the curtain and revealing Simon Cowell as a loveable, illiterate rogue. Next up: Hollywood Week! But first, for the five best moments from last night’s episode, check out these quick clips:

5. Maybe the same “holy spirit” that instructed Tiffany McCambell to audition for American Idol told George W. Bush we should go to war in Iraq.

4. The image of Simon cuddling with a puppy is almost enough to erase the memory of the first thing these three say.

3. Alesha Stelzl is infinitely more appealing when mimicking Dolly Parton than Celine Dion, but isn’t everyone?

2. “It’s a combination of glitter, sparkles and rose pedals.”

1. Our new favorite contestant: Danny Noriega, who is “more himself” (and therefore more awesome) this year.