Every Week on CMT’s new reality show Gone Country, a motley mix of Nashville misfits try to make it big on the Chesney tip. We’ll be watching (and chuckling):

Sixty Minutes of Kentucky Fried Reality in Three Sentences: Welcome to Gone Country, hosted by Rich of Big & Rich, where CMT takes seven distinctively non-country celebs (or sorta celebs) and attempts to transform them into marquee draws at the Grand Ole Opry. Our combatants: Brian Wilson’s daughter Carnie Wilson, Julio Iglesias Jr. (who Wilson mistakes for a member of Menudo), coffee addict Dee Snider of Twisted Sister, The Brady Bunch’s Marcia Brady (Maureen “Mo” McCormick), a platinum-mohawked Sisqo of “Thong Song” fame, American Idol’s Diana DeGarmo and Mr. Whitney Houston himself, Bobby “Super Chocolate” Brown (those are his words!). Quarantined in Rich’s Tennessee mansion, “the biggest log cabin on Earth” as Brown calls it, our seven contestants have two weeks to make themselves into Garth Brooks for a chance to have their country song produced by Rich himself.

The Honky-Tonkin’ Highlights: When McCormick asks Brown whether he really suffered a heart attack as was reported recently, Brown responds, “No, I had a big fart in my stomach.” The Brown-McCormick tandem has potential to be the most intriguing reality pairing since Flavor Flav and Bridgette Neilsen. Runner-up goes to Carnie Wilson, who said of Brown, “I don’t know if he’s gonna whip out a gun, a crack pipe … I don’t know.” Ironically, within five minutes of being at the Rich mansion, Brown goes off searching for the gun rack. Sisqo thanks Brown for “paving the way” for his music, which would make sense, if the “way” was paved solely with thongs and one-hit wonders. Plus, for everyone who thought Jan was the craziest Brady, this show flat-out disproves that theory, as “Mo” is so off-the-wall that even the barely sane Snider asserts that she needs to be medicated.

The Grand Ole Finale: The magnificent seven are teamed up with Nashville songwriters who will help them hone their craft. From the onset, Sisqo is surprisingly the fan favorite, while Rich himself is secretly rooting for Iglesias Jr. in hopes of capturing the elusive Latino country fans. We can almost guarantee Snider won’t win, given his proclamation, “I don’t like country music.” He then suffered an epic meltdown at the dinner table when no one on the production crew brought him his much-needed coffee.