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And You Shall Know Them by the Herd of Geeks: A Quick Guide to Harry Potter Bands

7/20/07, 5:24 pm EST

Photo:Harry PotterHarry Potter hysteria culminates tonight at 12:01 AM with the official release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the seventh and final book in the series. Nobody in the rock world will be as psyched as those folks who have formed bands named after Potter characters … to play music inspired by Potter characters. Here’s a guide to the world’s foremost wizard-rock outfits (a bunch who make surprisingly few wand jokes):

Band Name: Harry and the Potters
Name Inspiration: No mystery here
Sample Lyric: “We’ve got to save Ginny Weasley from the basilisk / We’ve got to save the school again” — “Save Ginny Weasley”

Band Name: The Remus Lupins
Name Inspiration: Harry’s third year Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, and old pal of his father’s who happens to be a warewolf
Sample Lyric: “Know you tried to make Hogwarts proud / So I’ll keep them singing, singing out loud / Remember Cedric Diggory” — “Remember Cedric”

Band Name: The Moaning Myrtles
Name Inspiration: Moaning Myrtle, the girl ghost who lives in the second floor girls’ bathroom at Hogwarts and died after the Chamber of Secrets was opened
Sample Lyric: “Bathrooms are great places for peep shows / Cedric Diggory’s really hot without his clothes” — “Prefects are Hot”

Band Name: Draco and the Malfoys
Name Inspiration: Harry’s arch nemesis at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy
Sample Lyric: “Harry Potter, you know that I hate you / You always think you’re better than me” — “The Power of Love”

Band Name: The Parselmouths
Name Inspiration: The select group of wizards who can speak the language of snakes
Sample Lyric: “Who’s that girl who’s always first to raise her hand? / Her name’s Hermione and boy she makes me mad” — “What Kind of name is Hermoine?”

Band Name: The Whomping Willows
Name Inspiration: The gnarled tree on Hogwarts’ grounds that threatens the life of those who come near it
Sample Lyric: “Now you’re kicking it with house elves and you’re every teacher’s pet” — “I Found a Loophole”

Band Name: The Hermione Crookshanks Experience
Name Inspiration: A combination of the names of Harry’s friend Hermione Granger and her orange cat, Crookshanks.
Sample Lyric: “Are you ready for the next D.A. meeting? Are you ready, are you prepared? / I’ve got my wand at the ready, my hand is steady” — “Ready and Prepared”

Photo Courtesy of Emily Burtner


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Comments

Snape fangirl | 6/13/2009, 2:04 pm EST

Oh come on what’s wrong with guys like this? I think it’s freakin awesome myself. It’s just comedy rock people! They’ve just decided to mix it with fandom!
And why the hell are you talking about getting rid of Fall Out Boy??? Sure the Jonas Brothers are spawn from a rats arse, but they’re disney, what the hell do you expect? Fall Out Boy are doing nothing like this, they aren’t wizard rock! And metal is just metal, sure it’s ok, but it’s boring. At least this is individual!
Love wizard rock, save Fall Out Boy!!!

mayhemfest | 9/22/2008, 10:02 am EST

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?THIS IS WHY WE NEED TO GET RID OF BANDS LIKE FALL OUT BOY AND WHO IN THE FUCK ARE THE JONAS?METAL WILL NEVER DIE.FOR THOSE ABOUT TO ROCK WE SALUTE YOU,SLIPKNOT,ACDC,
DISTURBED, METALLICA.

Wanna Be Wizard | 10/18/2007, 11:11 am EST

I wanna be a wizard. listening to this music has made me one. THANK YOU!

Pillowcat | 7/24/2007, 2:14 pm EST

oh dear god…this is fandom too far.
*WRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYY*
At least HORSE the band is a bit more subtle.Or 8-bit weapon, or Fenix Down…

Anonymous | 7/24/2007, 10:03 am EST

Well…let’s just hope we don’t end up seeing quidditch-themed music videos.

That just made me want to throw my book at a wall.

KOZMOSIS | 7/23/2007, 1:07 pm EST

THE MOVIES ARE OKAY
HAVE AN IMAGINATION AND WRITE LYRICS THAT ARE ORIGINAL
NOT RIP-OFFS OF ANOTHER PERSON’S CREATION

kao nashi | 7/23/2007, 4:24 am EST

I am eating my own face in despair.

ultramike2000 | 7/22/2007, 3:27 pm EST

Wow. I had no idea…

I wonder what the appeal is?

Savannah | 7/22/2007, 7:35 am EST

This is amazing.

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