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Pop Life: Special Live Earth Edition

7/9/07, 11:15 am EST

policeHow much of the ozone layer would you give up to never hear Billy Corgan sing again? Wouldn’t you sacrifice a polar icecap or two? It’s a tough question, but these are tough times, and Live Earth proved we need to combat global warming, because Enrique Iglesias would never lie about a thing like that. The whole day was full of TV mindfucks: Pauly Shore going onstage in Johannesberg to introduce Baaba Maal? Kanye West rapping, “Sting, you the only Police good in the hood”? Madonna teaming up with gypsy-punk madmen Gogol Bordello to do “La Isla Bonita”?

Madonna’s new theme song “Hey You” was unfortunately not a rewritten Pink Floyd song (“hey you, drivin’ SUVs / Dumping toxins in the breeze, can you hear me?”) But Roger Waters did show up to sing “Another Brick in the Wall,” yet skipped the temptation to have his confused-looking children’s choir chant, “We don’t need no carbon emissions.”

In terms of music, Live Earth was short on the two things that usually make superstar benefit concerts fun: strange duets and dead-band reunions. They could have used some more heavy hitters. The best duet, as everybody agreed, was Keith Urban and Alicia Keys doing “Gimme Shelter”; the best reunion was Japanese electro-prog pioneers Yellow Magic Orchestra, who inexplicably (yet excellently) got the final ten minutes of NBC’s highlight special to themselves, playing the Kyoto Temple. Some of the music bits were fun (Snoop, Lenny Kravitz, Beastie Boys), others weren’t (Melissa Etheridge). Duran Duran? They were GREAT. So where was Andy Taylor? No matter: I loved it when Simon Le Bon told the crowd, “Just coming here is not enough to get what’s got to be done, done…BUT…If we all sing…We might just make a stand, right here!” And the song he picked to save the planet with? “Girls On Film.” Simon, you have answered the call of awesome.

Metallica wheezed amiably through “Enter Sandman,” with James Hetfield’s beard providing much-needed comic relief, as did his huff-and-puff ad libs at the end: “Can I get some love out there? That’s niiiice!” Joss Stone was six kinds of terrible. Genesis looked a little lost, with Mike Rutherford wearing a black scarf, as if to symbolize the chilling–yet invisible–touch of environmental disaster. Phil Collins kept his eyes closed to sing “It’s no fun, bein’ a greenhouse emission.” (Well, no, he sang “Land of Confusion.” Okaaaay. Why?) Carson Daly chatted up stars like Ludacris (“I’m lending my celebrity to what’s going on today”) and Kevin Bacon (“We’ve been talking about stars making the switch from tour buses to biodiesel fuel,” a topic that no doubt keeps Kev and Carson bantering into the wee hours). Ann Curry did eye-rollingly puffy interviews with heavier hard-news types like Al Gore, even telling him, “You look like you’re having fun,” such a bizarre claim that even Dead Al had to chuckle at it. Al wouldn’t look like he was having fun if he was getting blown in the front row at a W.A.S.P. show.

There were highlights from Sydney (Wolfmother’s all-too-brief snippet of “Woman”) and Rio (Xuxa, you still got it), plus lowlights from Hamburg (Enrique Iglesias lurching into the crowd to sing “Bailamos”). There was penguin-core from Anarctica’s Nunatak, one of the day’s unequivocal musical finds, redefining the indie-rock parka. There were endless idiotic montages of creepy children. And Bon Jovi cheesed it up in high style, riding their biodiesel steel horse through “Wanted Dead Or Alive.” I loved Richie Sambora’s defiantly unbuttoned shirt, letting his voluptuous man-rack flap ominously in the wind. (Denise Richards, you let all that get away? You really DO give love a bad name!) Jane Goodall gave a speech in ape language—chimpin’ all over the world! Everybody went overboard trying to depoliticize the event; nobody mentioned the war, understandably. But you had to notice how many of the ads came from defense contractors, and wonder how citizens are supposed to slow global warming by wearing tank-tops while defense contractors run amok. Meanwhile, Jessica Alba didn’t show up at all, which was tragic.

The Police got stuck with the thankless job of closing Giant Stadium; it was an inevitable letdown, as the hotly anticipated “surprise secret guests” turned out to be just two guys who’d already played: John Mayer (making my-guitar-hurts faces, like it’s really hard to play “Message in a Bottle”) and Kanye West (shades of Puffy and Sting doing “Every Breath You Take” on MTV). The Police did their old teen-romance novelty “Can’t Stand Losing You,” a strange choice, if not as strange as Stewart’s glasses. But they sounded great. Sting subliminally reminded us all to recycle bottles, and encouraged French prostitutes to save energy by putting out the red light. Thanks, Sting!


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Comments

jj | 7/9/2007, 11:58 am EST

Most apt name for a band: Toni Collette and the Finish cause they, I hope, are DONE! Also, how about all the vapid, vacuous entertainment show hosts doing their mindless best to pump up the message of replacing light bulbs. I doubt many of them could even spell the word environment. The only persons who may have got any message were, unfortunately, the ones able to make the concerts (they were able to see and here more of the b/w gig presentations), casue there didn’t seem to be too much of a message being conveyed between sets, othere than who’s coming up next, what who was wearing and the typical ET and Etalk blather a la Tonia Kim, Tracy Melchor and that bunch: how’s my hair? They dress like it’s red carpet for everything, not too mention or question why at all these people get to say anything on the topic at all cause they simply don’t live the message they seemed to have represented. They don’t realize their professions are part of the problem of overconsumption and mass media conglomeration, etc, etc…..

Blazes | 7/9/2007, 11:59 am EST

I love these Boomer rockers like Sting and Phil Collins. They are so righteous and proud, not to mention helpful kind people.
Well, except for the fact that Sting traveled by the Concorde most often when jetting overseas. Sorta wasteful, I would say. Oh, and wasn’t it Phil Collins who was the Live Aid (1985) cross continental jet-setter that July day? Again, sorta careless in this age of global warming.
But like any good Boomer, they follow the money.

ceenote | 7/9/2007, 12:13 pm EST

the sound was terrible

Thundercrotch | 7/9/2007, 12:21 pm EST

Now THAT was a funny article. MUCH more entertaining reading this than anything that happened on Saturday (or was it Sunday…I can’t remember already).

I’m off to leave my hair dryer running while I use excessive amounts of hairspray, preparing to leave my home in my five story rectangular apartment complex on wheels I drive 3 miles to the store to buy beer in aluminum cans that I can carry in my styrofoam cooler.

love it. | 7/9/2007, 12:23 pm EST

Duran Duran is still one of the great 80’s groups!! :)

who cares? | 7/9/2007, 12:43 pm EST

jj said it best.

I’m all for supporting the environment, but this thing was big for two reasons and two reasons only:

1) money
2) being green is trendy now, so countless people who know little about the environment get up on their soap-boxes.

Yet another failed opprotunity to help the planet.

I just have one question. Why didn’t Gore do anything about the problem when he was Vice President for eight years?

RADIO VOX | 7/9/2007, 12:51 pm EST

Andy Taylor’s absence from Duran Duran is hard to overlook. Musically, his fiery guitar playing is painfully absent. Aesthetically, Duran Duran’s overall image is off-balance without Andy’s cool and defiant onstage presence. I felt sorry for the substitute guitar player who was painfully trying to blend in, but the chemistry is not the same. Particularly, with John Taylor, who seems lost trying to chum it up with anyone other than his longtime partner in crime. Andy, we miss you. Hope one day you will return to Duran and make the world right again.

Muzakman | 7/9/2007, 1:05 pm EST

Kanye West ruined the Police’s finish. He is very untalented. Rap is garbage. Why do people pretend he is an “artist”?
Roger Waters and the Foo Fighters were the best acts. I thought Cat Stevens was a welcome act as well.

Sanchez | 7/9/2007, 1:26 pm EST

Lenny – Let love Rule…Awesome.

yo | 7/9/2007, 1:35 pm EST

Oh my gosh, Mr. Who Cares? You’ve singlehandedly revealed Al Gore for the fraud he really is. What a profound question — “Why didn’t Gore do anything about the problem when he was Vice President for eight years?” — I bet NPR, CNN and MSNBC will be calling you for interviews later today. You’re so right — because the vice president sets agenda and policy for the whole nation, and Gore should have been telling the rest of the country what to do instead of “doing his job as vice president” during the most prosperous period of our country in 50 years and focusing on carrying out the agenda of Congress and the president. What a fraud! You’re brilliant!!!

jj | 7/9/2007, 1:56 pm EST

Living the way we should, or living the way which would leave smaller environmental ‘footprints’ on the world is hard. Just try it, completely reverse, change your habitually indoctrinated lifestyles and you’ll see. We’ve grown consumerism and the military industrial complex to mega-gargantuan sizes with much power over our minds, and bodies. Stop deriding people like Al Gore, Suzuki and the like. They ARE trying to make a difference. Do you drive a prius, use bio diesel? It’s funny how these players get criticized for galavanting around the countries in their gas guzzling busses. Yes they do things that harm, BUT they are trying to make a concerted effort (using biodiesel, carbon offsets, etc.). Just see what they’re up against when all the coverage continued to show ad spots continuing the over-consumption that too many in the west are born into. You have this mixed message, that on the one hand tries to change, but on the other tries to get us to remain the same. A few yars back it was all recycle and more importantly REDUCE. Now it seems it’s more focused on recycle again and don’t talk too much about changing our lifestyles cause that would be too difficult, too problematic and more importantly too hard for mega corporations to market and make a profit from. Oh, as things change, they remain the same.

phillygirl | 7/9/2007, 2:02 pm EST

This concert was broadcast on three different channels (Bravo, Sundance and NBC), yet everytime I turned one of them on, it was a commercial or some correspondent interviewing someone. The one time I caught a musical performance? Rhianna. Whoopty-friggin-do.

jj | 7/9/2007, 2:08 pm EST

phillygirl, that’s what happens when corporations are given the green light to handle the coverage, no message. Perhaps there should be a live earth channel in the future? That way everyone can get the right message through TV???? my tongue is firmly in my cheek

IPhone Aid | 7/9/2007, 2:21 pm EST

Everytime I turned it on, i saw an Iphone ad.

People, WAKE UP! We MUST act NOW to save the IPhone!

Live Earth = anti-environment | 7/9/2007, 2:24 pm EST

The people involved in setting this thing up are full of so much BS it is not even funny.

People have already mentioned the eltricity used to watch the concert, the jets needed to transport musicians, the gas needed to drive to the shows etc.

What nobody has pointed out is that AFTER the show was over, rather than disposing of waste in a environmentally friendly way (i.e. recycling) Live Earth instead sent the trash directly to the dump…without even trying to sort for recylcing. The whole thing was noted by reporters staying behind to see how much they really cared about helping the environment. The answer…only slightly more than zero.

If people really want an environmental concert…look no further than Bonnaroo. In addition to widespread recycling programs, they actually use renrewable resources to power stages (solar if you’re curious) and have the vehicles owned by the festival powered by biodesil.

Live Earth is full of hypocrits (none bigger than Al Gore himself) who care only about money and not the stated “goal” of the concert. If they really did care, they would have done so many things differently the show would hardly resemble the piece of crap we saw.

King Wacker | 7/9/2007, 2:27 pm EST

Roger Waters sang about this event during his preformance…. Money… Those bands will sell their records in great quanties this week… Either through CD’s (made by oil products) or MP3’s (computers also made from oil based procucts)… Gore can settle down and consider the run for the big big job of being President… (and who will vote for him? what will his platform be?”)… as stated by a few other folks – corporations are the big gainers from this concert of the hip and rich.

Look, I live up here in Canada and when I heard some shit at the concert about Polar Bears, well it pissed me off. Who gives a fuck about the Polar Bears in Rio? Just as much as we care about Panda bears… Not saying we should wipe them out, but using two species as a warning sign when there are thousands of species being wiped out every week… Well, those ones don’t make cute looking toys… And besides, maybe if we stopped killing each other we could focus on saving the planet… Maybe if we stopped our “Bombs for Oil” campaigns we could figure what the hell is happening to those poor species that are being wiped out due to our greed.

Maybe Kayne West can give me a ‘uh- yeah!’ on that note….

Spinal Tap | 7/9/2007, 2:29 pm EST

Perfect metaphor for the day: A fake metal band for a fake crisis. Brilliant!

yo yo | 7/9/2007, 2:32 pm EST

I understand Gore had other responsibilities as VP, but he couldn’t bring the issue up?

If he truely cared so much about the environment he would have, rather than waiting to make a documentary about it. The guy is a piece of shit.

If you want to bash me for raising some points that should be made, then fine. Just keep your mind open. In the mean time…read this article in the USA Today about dude…

http://www.usatoday .com/news/opinion/editorials/2 006-08-09-gore-green_x.htm

yo yo | 7/9/2007, 2:36 pm EST

for whatever reason that link doesn’t work.

Google “al gore hypocrite”

It the first listing.

ChP | 7/9/2007, 2:37 pm EST

Muzakman | 7/9/2007, 1:05 pm EST

Kanye West ruined the Police’s finish. He is very untalented. Rap is garbage. Why do people pretend he is an “artist”?

totally agreed wit u

Rich | 7/9/2007, 2:40 pm EST

I thought for sure that The Police’ were going to roll out Freddie Mercury’s rotting corpse to do “Bicycle Race” or something. Instead, this marginally talented black fellow crashes the stage and prances around stage yelling “yeah, yeah” and “uh huh!” Freddie’s bones might have done better. And where the heck was security?

BurtBacharach | 7/9/2007, 3:02 pm EST

Who gives a fuck about the climate? Apparently the whole world does, but until everyone starts riding bicycles and voids their entire life of carbon-emission they are complete hypocrites. But wouldn’t the process of creating a bicycle make some form of pollutant. Isn’t it just an obvious never-ending circle of hypocrisy. How many artists there *probably* drive SUVs, own exotic sports-cars, live in houses well above a normal man means, and travel the world in big ole jet-airliners? Until people live in tents and live off the lands, they need to shut-up. I agree with stopping corporations dumping toxic sludge into the environment, and having set gas mileage for cars–possibly doing away with sports-utility vehicles entirely. But criticizing every mean of life of the average people when the supporters of this concert are most likely-all things considered- the biggest polluters amongst us.

Let’s also all the energy wasted on this concert, the raw-materials used to construct stages, the fuel burned to created electricity to bring you Live Earth, and the electricity consumed by people using their televisions to watch it and people who traveled there to watch the concert. It just does not make much sense, indeed.

TPG | 7/9/2007, 3:09 pm EST

The Police reunite after 25 years and their final song is hijacked by a talentless hack like Kayne West….who does nothing but mumble some crap and jump around like a mental patient.

The Police should be torched for signing off on that. Shame on them.

bovine | 7/9/2007, 3:53 pm EST

Kasabian and Spinal Tap were what made it all worth while.

Attn Sheep | 7/9/2007, 4:52 pm EST

Can we please get off the “green trend” and move on to the next one? Tipper’s trite was easier to swallow than her man’s BS. At least the broad wasn’t a hypocrite. I doubt she ever owned a 2 Live Crew album. Although….

Somewhere In the Middle | 7/9/2007, 5:01 pm EST

Wow, Kanye is exactly right. Having no real police in the hood is a good thing. That is why people are fighting tooth and nail to buy property and live in Compton. Not to mention if Sting ever stepped foot in the hood, he’d probably get carjacked by fans of Kanye. Way to go Kanye, you’ve proved once again on live television that you are in fact retarded. My apologies to any offended retarded people.

KUNE CHAJEE NAMJA | 7/9/2007, 5:33 pm EST

The best performances: Rize, from Japan (incredible energy, music and raps), Macy Gray from Brazil, Red Hot Chilis from London and Crowded House from Australia.
The worst: Kayne West, BY FAR. Why is this guy popular??

Blazes | 7/9/2007, 6:29 pm EST

Hey You, out there kicking Gore can you feel me?

Hey you, standing in the aisles
With sweaty feet and rock star smiles
Can you feel me?

Hey you, don’t help them to bury the electric car
Don’t give in to Man without a fight.

Hey you, out there on your own
typing bullshit on your phone
Would you touch me?
Hey you, with you ear against the iPod
Waiting for someone to call out
Would you touch me?
Hey you, would you help me to carry the torch for change?
Open your mind, I’m voting smart.

But it was only fantasy.

The kids were too high,
As you can see.

No matter how he tried,
He could not break free.
And the Meds ate into his brain.

Huh? | 7/9/2007, 8:54 pm EST

Actually, message in a bottle is a very hard song to play.

Congrats | 7/9/2007, 9:11 pm EST

So a whole bunch of people got together to try to do something about a problem. They raised some money and some people got educated and inspired.

Meanwhile you sat at home on your ass and wrote snarky comments about them, possibly in an attempt to feel superior and hide your own lack of skill in inspiring, educating, or even playing guitar.

I agree with some of your comments about the musical highlights, (Keith Urban and Alicia Keyes!), but the whole “I’m snarkier than you are” vibe is so over. Let it go.

We’re all in this together, dude. Let’s try to make things a little better, what do you say?

BurtBacharach | 7/9/2007, 9:36 pm EST

Just because people got together to play to make a change, does that mean that they are? This whole campaign that’s been going on this year mostly about carbon emissions and what-not is just encouragement to change, but no one is really doing anything, honestly. I think that Rob Sheffield’s review is funny, I mean if writing did not poke fun at people and it was just boring drivel, who would read it?

We get it. The planet is heating up, a concert isn’t going to change a damn thing.

Jeremie | 7/9/2007, 9:38 pm EST

You people disgust me. a twenty nine hour long concert, held worldwide and advancing a message of friendliness toward our planet, reaches 2 billion people and all you can do is turn it into an Entertainment Tonight critique complete with jokes about fucking FASHION?! What in the hell is your major malfunction. You gripe about the need for change and when something like this happens all you can do is rip on it. I would suggest that the many people responsible for bringing us this event were doing so out of legitimate concern for the future of the planet and that writing an article like this does nothing but fall into the game of those who would criticize the movement to end global warming. Way to go Rolling Stone, you’ve gone a long way toward assuring us that, no matter what, you’ll be there to advise James Hetfield on what to do with his facial hair. I would also suggest that you remove this ridiculous piece of tripe from your webpage before you alienate anyone else who might think that change is something that might actually be plausible in our lifetime. By the way, I have a beard, how do you think I should trim it, or maybe I should just compliment it with an emo coat?

Mike from Oregon | 7/10/2007, 12:23 am EST

Unbeleivable – Honest to God I don’t know Rob Sheffield is but the fact of the matter is that this was a great event. Could it have been better? Perhaps, but I thought it was a great reason to start acting rather than thinking differently. I am in and I will do my part to reduce my and my families consumption of electricity, water, fuel, meat, conveniences and all that is detrimental to the earth. We can not replace it.

Wah! | 7/10/2007, 1:00 am EST

How people could ever rag on being lectured to for 29 hours by wealthy rock stars is also lost on me. Rock stars will buy carbon offsets to fly guilt free on their private jets.

It is US, not them, who must sacrifice. Don’t you get it? What do you think this was about?

If the computer climate models are wrong, at least the Rock Stars will still be around to let us know how me must live to prevent next year’s crisis.

As a previous poster suggested: if you can’t play guitar, you should just shut up and obey the cultural elite.

Bored by Gore | 7/10/2007, 10:56 am EST

The NBC ratings for this show finished last, BEHIND reruns of Cops!

From Nielsen:
“The three-hour Live Earth Concert on NBC finished last, with just 2.75 million viewers and a 0.9 rating/3 share among adults 18-49 from 8-11 p.m.”

That’s probably less people than those who watched South Park’s takedown of Gore in the ManBearPig Episode.

Between the ad nauseum IPhone ads and the recycled acts from the 80’s, no one cared.

What an absolute waste of time and … energy.

Live Guilt Free or Die!

love it. | 7/10/2007, 12:18 pm EST

It puts a lump in my throat. :)

cota | 7/10/2007, 1:22 pm EST

Even if the promoters of this concert are wrong with their assumptions, what do you all think is the right thing to do? Bussiness as usual? Mass consumpsion (sp?)?, pollution?, over-population?? When the entire planet looks like an over populated third world country what then will the smug say and do?? Oh yeah, let’s blame it on them darn liberals blah blah blah,,,,,Well, any ideas??

jv | 7/10/2007, 1:40 pm EST

rob, i tend to love what you write but let’s face it the Smashing Pumpkins put on the best sets of the whole 24 hours.

Brandong | 7/10/2007, 6:12 pm EST

Why was Joss Stone six kinds of terrible? I really can’t understand why he would say something so strong. I’m not even a fan but she didn’t do anything that bad, at least to me.

Brandong | 7/10/2007, 6:14 pm EST

also if the keith urban/alicia keys duet was the best then everything else must have been terrible. They took all the swagger and fire out of that song and made it so polished and pop friendly that it should have been aborted from the start.

AT | 7/11/2007, 4:03 am EST

Andy Taylor quit Duran Duran in October 2006. He’s got a lot better things to do that play corporate type gigs like this one.

http://www.andytaylors tudiosibiza.com/home.html

D uran Duran lost it the day they chose Timbaland and Timberlake over Andy Taylor.

lasgames | 7/11/2007, 8:42 am EST

Is Rob a real writer for Rolling Stone who thinks he’s a comedian? All he does is put down the artist,whats up with that? fuck the rolling stone!

Brien Comerford | 7/12/2007, 12:25 pm EST

Vegetarians can save the planet. Because the meat,pork, lamb, poultry and fish industries cause massive land, air and water pollution that instensify global warming/climate change. Accolades to rock music’s ardent vegetarians including Paul McCartney, Chrissie Hynde, Morrissey, Moby, Joan Jett, Thom Yorke, Boston’s Tom Scholz, Bryan Adams, and the Church’s great lead vocalist, Steve Kilbey.

Ryan | 7/12/2007, 4:28 pm EST

Do away with SUV’s entirely? You lay a finger on my jeep and Ill put a boot in your ass!! Fuck these catch terms of “carbon footprint” and “carbon credit”! Just another way for companies and goernments to raise prices/taxes. One degree over 100 years…yes Im shaking in my shoes and people in NY city are buying life vests by the truck load…..bullshit! EAT MEAT too!

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