When Rock Daily caught wind that casting agents were seeking “beautiful Asian transgender women” to star in Amy Winehouse’s David LaChapelle-directed video for “Tears Dry On Their Own,” we had visions of the saucy British soulster making her very own Crying Game. Alas, the finished project is pretty tame — a jilted but resilient Winehouse makes her way past a cast of colorful characters during a particularly harrowing stroll down Hollywood Boulevard. But if Winehouse (who’s partial to flamboyant makeup, herself) had taken a few cues from Hollywood, the plot could have been far more dramatic:

• Winehouse’s car breaks down, so she arrives at the doorstep of a creepy mansion where she sings and dances with a crowd of transgendered folks until everything goes wrong …

• On a road trip to a drag show in California, Winehouse experiences car trouble, so she and her traveling companions fight adversity in the small town they’re stranded in until they’re loved and respected by all.

• A small newspaper names one of Winehouse’s pals the Filthiest Person in the World, which draws the ire of a crazy neighboring family that sells babies on the black market. Somebody dies, somebody chows down on a pile of excrement and … scene.