Breaking news from the “No Shit” Department: Album sales are down, again, 17 percent worse than last year’s sorry numbers over the same quarter. How bad has it gotten? Record label guys are high-fiving one another about this week’s Avril Lavigne vs. Nine Inch Nails sales race, and that both artists might shift 200,000 units this week. 200,000? That’s what N*Sync and Hootie & The Blowfish called a slow Thursday. More duh: Digital sales are on the rise. It’s this shift in technology that has record companies execs shaking in their black leather shoes. Like the mediums before it (vinyl, cassette, 8-track, mini-disc), the fall of the compact disc is inevitable. Don’t blame it on the lack of big name releases: Fall Out Boy, for all the bombastic fanfare that accompanied their new album Infinity On High, have sold only 760,000 copies. It’s a sad fact that ring tones, which play for about 10 seconds before the phone is answered, are selling at a similar pace to that of entire albums. The logic is simple: Why waste shelf space on a CD case when a computer will store it for you? Why put a 12-song CD in your car stereo when you can just as simply plug in your 40 gig iPod? The CD is dying, but it doesn’t have to die without a fight.
Some musicians are staving off the record sale decline in creative ways. Leading the charge is the aforementioned Nine Inch Nails’ Trent Reznor, who created an entire alternative internet-based universe around his concept album Year Zero two months before the album was released. Adding to allure of owning a physical copy, Reznor employs a Thermochrome compact disc, which means it changes colors when warm. Let’s see your mp3s change color. Beck similarly packaged (and then repackaged) The Information with a DIY sticker set, only to be penalized by the British Music charts for an unfair marketing advantage. Prince went all Willy Wonka with 3121, stashing golden tickets in the packaging that were entries to an intimate Prince concert.
There are a few more examples, but sadly only a few. With the ongoing adaptability of the iPod, the increasingly better quality of digital music, the near-extinction of DRM technology and the plague of album leaks, the Record Industry must think of innovative ways to combat against further sales slides. If this were Hollywood and summer blockbusters were in jeopardy, they’d add more explosions atop the explosions…but a self-destructing CD isn’t really enticing, so we’ll put our marketing caps on and think of some suggestions:
- Keep raising the prices! If less people are buying CDs, gouge the wallets of those who still are.
- Synergize: Accompanying each release should be a voucher, either for half-price off the service fees for a concert ticket or $5 off band merchandising. Is it kind of like bribing fans to buy the album? Yes, but it gets the fans to buy an overpriced album and an overpriced T-shirt!
- Don’t touch the radio: FM is doing a stellar job. Labels and stations should continue to play the same Top 40 songs over and over again. There’s no point in jeopardizing record sales by introducing listeners to new music.
- Keep leaking albums: Thanks to MySpace album streams and Limewire, fans now have a chance to evaluate whether or not an album is worth purchasing before it actually comes out. The label’s generosity is appreciated.
- Arms race: By breaking a compact disc in half, you have a sharp weapon that you could use as self-defense against evil-doers. The record labels could align themselves with the NRA by saying that if the CD is eradicated, it’s an infringement of our Second Amendment rights. With the NRA in tow, people will be too scared not to buy CDs.
- Technological devolution: Developing a “Y2K” bug, one that actually works though, that will destroy the entire internet and every computer, thus rendering mp3s useless, is also recommended.
In closing, following these simple steps will ensure that the compact disc will live on into the next millennium. In other words, keep up the good work.

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- Portions of Album Content Provided by All Music Guide © 2008 All Media Guide, LLC.