In the age of instant gratification and news as-it-happens, the idea of a long-pre-scripted show boasting that its storyline is “ripped from the headlines” is a joke. And when websites and even TV shows like American Idol allow audience interaction to direct content to some extent, a show that merely tells a story is, well, a little bit quaint.

TV shows obviously need to evolve to keep up. To that end, they should occasionally adopt the “Choose Your Own Ending” principle we all learned from children’s books: Just before the last commercial break, the audience is asked how the show should end. Say it’s ER: Does Dr. Kovac miraculously save his hemorrhaging patient, or does he accidentally sew a bedpan inside the man’s stomach? A fat, sweaty clown bursts in to the hospital…does he have flowers to cheer up the kids, or an AK to go after the overworked doctor who botched his meds? (Either way, hilarity/bloodshed ensues.) The audience then goes online to vote during the commercial, the results are instantly tallied like an MTV next-video poll, and after the break the winning ending unfolds.

The possibilities are endless, and would only involve shooting one quick alternate ending per episode. More adventurous shows could film multiple, divergent plotlines and allow the audience to choose a direction at each commercial break (then putting the unaired clips on their website for fans to log on and watch a completely different “what if” storyline to only further confuse fans of Lost).

Sitcoms could take it a step further by broadcasting live, taking audience suggestions in real-time for comic props or situations that throw the script a little off-kilter (sort of a higher budget Whose Line Is It Anyway?, only with much larger audience participation, less sense that you’re just watching the exact same thing over and over, and 150 percent less Drew Carey — don’t ask us how). Hey, it couldn’t be any less funny than a pre-scripted According to Jim.

Sure, the idea would inevitably backfire when Jennifer Love Hewitt snaps after her 5,000th “Show us your tits!” request, but by and large, it would keep TV a lot fresher than it currently is…and tide us over until TV manufacturers catch up and allow us to pick alternate endings directly on our remote controls.

What do you guys think? What TV overhauls would you like to see?

[photo by Isaac White (http://www.cymagen.org/)]