Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience

It is what it says it is, a Jonas Brothers concert film in 3D. That earns the movie one star just for truth in advertising. I doled out a second star because director Bruce Hendricks had the taste to steal from A Hard Day's Night in the off-stage scenes where the JoBros — Kevin, 21, Joe, 19, and Nick, 16 — scamper around like the early Beatles in an escape from marauding fans. It's no mystery that the target audience for this G-rated bubblegum fantasy is tweens, parents of tweens and the occasional pervert. They'll be so pleased. Anything for the rest of humanity? Not so much, though connoisseurs of camp will thrill to the throbbing 3D phallic symbolism when the boys thrust their hoses (the rubber kind used for garden work) right through the screen and spray their squealing audience with jizzy white foam. I've said enough. You're on your own.