THE LOW POST: 101 Ways to Lie About Iraq

The rest of the people that the Kleins of the world are calling "leftists" are mostly cautious consumers who watch a lot of Netflix movies, have maybe read Love in the Time of Cholera once or twice, and whose most aggressive step in the direction of socialism is a vote in favor of increased school spending. They might drive a foreign car, or willingly see a movie with subtitles. If that makes them "leftists," what word are we going to use for real leftists? It's totally fucking stupid, and Klein is old enough and close to bright enough to see the absurdity of red-baiting the basically timid conservatism of the American TV-watching, net-surfing leisure class. If you gave the people Joe Klein calls "leftists" a choice -- told them they could have an instant Scandanavian-style state-directed economy, but only if The Sopranos was pulled off the air -- how many of them do you think would vote for even that kind of socialism? The A&E network has nothing to worry about, let's put it that way. Then there's this whole business of liberals who are accused of "rooting" for failure in Iraq. I'm sorry, but the next pundit who whips that one out should have his balls stuffed down his throat. You cocksuckers beat the drum to send these kids to war, and then you turn around and accuse us of rooting for them to die? Fuck you for even thinking that. We're Americans just like you. You don't have the right to get us into this mess and then turn around and call us traitors. Your credibility is long gone on this issue. Shut up about us.

Beyond that, what you say doesn't even make any sense. For most of us, if we thought there was any chance this thing could work, we'd have been for it, or at least not so violently against it. Instead, our opposition to the war was based on our absolute conviction that it would end in disaster -- which it incidentally has. But according to Klein, if we see a guy step off the top of the Empire State Building, we're supposed to root for him to nail the dismount. The whole issue is irrelevant and absurd. This is a catastrophe, not a baseball game. "Rooting" is a kid's word; grow the fuck up.

Of course, rooting is what Klein says he himself has been doing. "I've been rooting for U.S. success ever since the invasion," he says, "because, after the overpowering arrogance and stupidity that led to this disaster, we owe some peace and stability to the Iraqis and the region."

It's interesting that he doesn't include himself in that "overpowering arrogance and stupidity." That's because, according to Klein, he's been against the war since that September 2002 column he wrote about Al Gore. Except for one thing -- while Klein in that column did point out many things that could go wrong in Iraq, and suggested that we all give the invasion a good thinking over before we signed off on it ("this should cause us to pause, slow down, talk this over...), he didn't actually say we shouldn't go. In fact, he would say just the opposite six months later, on Meet the Press:

MR. KLEIN: ...This is a really tough decision. War may well be the right decision at this point. In fact, I think it -- it's -- it -- it probably is.
RUSSERT: Now that's twice you've said that: "It's the right war." You believe it's the wrong time. Why do you think it's the right war?
MR. KLEIN: Because sooner or later, this guy has to be taken out. Saddam has -- Saddam Hussein has to be taken out.