A friend of mine sent a link to Sunday's David Brooks column on Haiti, a genuinely beautiful piece of occasional literature. Not many writers would have the courage to use a tragic event like a 50,000-fatality earthquake to volubly address the problem of nonwhite laziness and why it sometimes makes natural disasters seem timely, but then again, David Brooks isn't just any writer.
Rather than go through the Brooks piece line by line, I figured I'd just excerpt a few bits here and there and provide the Cliff's Notes translation at the end. It's really sort of a masterpiece of cultural signaling — if you live anywhere between 59th st and about 105th, you can hear the between-the-lines messages with dog-whistle clarity. Some examples:
Stream White House Correspondents' Dinner Chuck Schumer Marks Trump's First 100 Days With Scathing Playlist 5 Questions for Samantha Bee on Staying Sane in Trump's America Seth Rogen, Lonely Island Making Fyre Festival-Like Film See Stephen Colbert Congratulate America for Surviving 100 Days of TrumpAll Stories
This is not a natural disaster story. This is a poverty story. It's a story about poorly constructed buildings, bad infrastructure and terrible public services. On Thursday, President Obama told the people of Haiti: "You will not be forsaken; you will not be forgotten." If he is going to remain faithful to that vow then he is going to have to use this tragedy as an occasion to rethink our approach to global poverty. He's going to have to acknowledge a few difficult truths.
The first of those truths is that we don't know how to use aid to reduce poverty. Over the past few decades, the world has spent trillions of dollars to generate growth in the developing world. The countries that have not received much aid, like China, have seen tremendous growth and tremendous poverty reductions. The countries that have received aid, like Haiti, have not.
In the recent anthology "What Works in Development?," a group of economists try to sort out what we've learned. The picture is grim. There are no policy levers that consistently correlate to increased growth. There is nearly zero correlation between how a developing economy does one decade and how it does the next. There is no consistently proven way to reduce corruption. Even improving governing institutions doesn't seem to produce the expected results.
The chastened tone of these essays is captured by the economist Abhijit Banerjee: "It is not clear to us that the best way to get growth is to do growth policy of any form. Perhaps making growth happen is ultimately beyond our control."
TRANSLATION: Don't bother giving any money, it doesn't do any good. And feeling guilty about not giving money doesn't do anyone any good either. In fact, you're probably helping by not doing anything.
The second hard truth is that micro-aid is vital but insufficient. Given the failures of macrodevelopment, aid organizations often focus on microprojects. More than 10,000 organizations perform missions of this sort in Haiti. By some estimates, Haiti has more nongovernmental organizations per capita than any other place on earth. They are doing the Lord's work, especially these days, but even a blizzard of these efforts does not seem to add up to comprehensive change.
TRANSLATION: I, David Brooks, am doing my Christian best right here at home. Look, I even used a capital "L" in the word "Lord." And I wrote that thing about Obama's Christian Realism a few weeks ago. So I'm doing my part. Of course I'd volunteer to help, but intellectually I just don't think volunteering really helps. I mean, there are studies and everything.
Third, it is time to put the thorny issue of culture at the center of efforts to tackle global poverty. Why is Haiti so poor? Well, it has a history of oppression, slavery and colonialism. But so does Barbados, and Barbados is doing pretty well. Haiti has endured ruthless dictators, corruption and foreign invasions. But so has the Dominican Republic, and the D.R. is in much better shape. Haiti and the Dominican Republic share the same island and the same basic environment, yet the border between the two societies offers one of the starkest contrasts on earth — with trees and progress on one side, and deforestation and poverty and early death on the other.
As Lawrence E. Harrison explained in his book "The Central Liberal Truth," Haiti, like most of the world's poorest nations, suffers from a complex web of progress-resistant cultural influences. There is the influence of the voodoo religion, which spreads the message that life is capricious and planning futile. There are high levels of social mistrust. Responsibility is often not internalized. Child-rearing practices often involve neglect in the early years and harsh retribution when kids hit 9 or 10.
We're all supposed to politely respect each other's cultures. But some cultures are more progress-resistant than others, and a horrible tragedy was just exacerbated by one of them.
TRANSLATION: Although it is true that Haiti was just like five minutes ago a victim of a random earthquake that killed tens of thousands of people, I'm going to skip right past the fake mourning period and point out that Haitians are a bunch of lazy niggers who can't keep their dongs in their pants and probably wouldn't be pancaked under fifty tons of rubble if they had spent a little more time over the years listening to the clarion call of white progress, and learning to use a freaking T-square, instead of singing and dancing and dabbling in not-entirely-Christian religions and making babies all the fucking time. I know I'm supposed to respect other cultures and keep my mouth shut about this stuff, but my penis is only four and a third inches long when fully engorged and so I'm kind of at the end of my patience just generally, especially when it comes to "progress-resistant" cultures.
Fourth, it's time to promote locally led paternalism. In this country, we first tried to tackle poverty by throwing money at it, just as we did abroad. Then we tried microcommunity efforts, just as we did abroad. But the programs that really work involve intrusive paternalism.
These programs, like the Harlem Children's Zone and the No Excuses schools, are led by people who figure they don't understand all the factors that have contributed to poverty, but they don't care. They are going to replace parts of the local culture with a highly demanding, highly intensive culture of achievement — involving everything from new child-rearing practices to stricter schools to better job performance.
It's time to take that approach abroad, too. It's time to find self-confident local leaders who will create No Excuses countercultures in places like Haiti, surrounding people — maybe just in a neighborhood or a school — with middle-class assumptions, an achievement ethos and tough, measurable demands.
The late political scientist Samuel P. Huntington used to acknowledge that cultural change is hard, but cultures do change after major traumas. This earthquake is certainly a trauma. The only question is whether the outside world continues with the same old, same old.
TRANSLATION: The best thing we can do for the Haitians is let them deal with the earthquake all by themselves and wallow in their own filth and shitty engineering so they can come face to face with how achievement-oriented and middle-class they aren't. Then when it's all over we can come in and institute a program making the survivors earn the right to keep their kids by opening their own Checkers' franchises and completing Associate's Degrees in marketing at the online University of Phoenix. Maybe then they'll learn the No Excuses attitude real life demands, so the next time something like this happens they won't be pulling this "woe is us" act and bawling their fucking eyes out on CNN while begging for fresh water and band-aids and other handouts. Maybe that will happen, or maybe we'll just keep sending money, fools that we are, so that they can keep making more of those illiterate ambitionless babies we'll have to pull out of the next disaster wreckage.
p.s. Did I miss anything? Because I think that's pretty much it. One would have thought a column on the Haitian's lack of an achievement culture could maybe wait until after the bodies were cold, but… hey, who am I to judge?
p.p.s. I've got to put this comment up on the main piece, since so many people seem to have missed my point.
Again, unlike Brooks, I actually lived in the Third World for ten years and I admit it — I'm not exactly in the habit of sending checks to Abkhazian refugees, mainly because I'm not interested in buying some local Russian gangster a new Suzuki Samurai to tool around Sochi in. And I've actually seen what happens to the money people think they're giving to Russian orphanages goes, so no dice there, either.
But you know what? Next time there's an earthquake in Russia or Georgia, I'm probably going to wait at least until they're finished pulling the bodies of dead children out of the rubble before I start writing articles blasting a foreign people for being corrupt, lazy drunks with an unsatisfactorily pervasive achievement culture whose child-rearing responsibilities might have to be yanked from them by with-it Whitey for their own good.
An earthquake is nobody's fault. There's nothing to do after a deadly earthquake but express remorse and feel sorry. It's certainly not the time to scoff at all the victim country's bastard children and put it out there on the Times editorial page that if these goddamned peasants don't get their act together after a disaster this big, it might just be necessary to start swinging the big stick of Paternalism at them.
I mean, shit, that's what Brooks is doing here — that last part of the piece is basically a threat, he's saying that Haiti might have to be FORCED to adopt "middle-class assumptions" and an "achievement ethos" because they're clearly incapable of Americanizing themselves at a high enough rate of speed to please Brooks. That's this guy's immediate reaction to 50,000 people crushed to death in an earthquake. Metaphorically speaking, he's standing over the rubble and telling the people trapped under there that they need more of a "No Excuses" culture, which is insane on many different levels.
Brooks's implication that the Haitians wouldn't have died in such great numbers had they been Americans is the kind of thing that is going to come back to bite us the next time we have a nuclear accident or a hurricane disaster or a 9/11 and we're looking to the rest of the world for sympathy and understanding. The notion that these deaths aren't an accident but someone's fault, among other things someone's fault because they practice an unhelpful sort of religion, is beyond offensive.
p.p.p.s And yes, Brooks is Jewish. So let's say he's doing his Judeo-Christian best. Again, this guy is saying that Haitians got killed in an earthquake because their religion makes them planning-averse. Are we really to believe that Haitians don't live in earthquake-proof homes because of their religious beliefs? We have millions of Americans who literally believe the rapture is imminent — would Brooks expect them to blow off flood insurance?