The Serious Side of Eminem: The Rolling Stone Interview

Eminem has become a family man. during two long conversations over two days in Detroit in October, he constantly mentions the kids he's raising, as any proud father would: His daughter, Hailie Jade, will soon be nine, his niece Alaina is eight, and his half brother, Nate, is eighteen. In October, Marshall Mathers turned thirty-two. He grew up in Kansas City, Missouri, and Detroit without a father figure, but he has grown into a committed parent who goes to school plays and everything. He schedules most of his recording in Detroit and has put his movie career on hold so he can be home with the kids at night.

He has slowed down his drinking and his drug use since two 2000 gun charges that he feared would take him away from Hailie, but his ex, Kim Mathers, has slogged through her own legal morass. In June 2003 she was arrested for possession of cocaine, then failed to show up in court and for a short while hid from the police. Eminem says that explaining the situation to Hailie and Alaina "was one of the hardest things I ever had to go through." At the time of our first interview, Kim was in jail. At the time of our last interview, she had been released. "She's out right now," he said. "We're hoping that stays kosher."

Encore is Eminem's fifth solo album, and he remains one of the most skilled, compelling, audacious, obnoxious and important MCs in hip-hop. He thanks his mother for the troubled childhood that still fuels his anger in "Never Enough"; he tells Kim that he hates her in "Puke" and that he still loves her in "Crazy in Love"; and he declares his devotion to Hailie on "Mockingbird," which he calls his most emotional song ever. He also attacks President Bush for the Iraq War in "Mosh" and says, "Strap him with an AK. . . . Let him impress Daddy that way."

On Encore, Eminem refers to himself as "Rain Man" because, he says, he doesn't know how to do anything besides hip-hop. He doesn't consider himself "a good talker" because his conversation is rarely as direct as his rhymes, but for two days when he sat for the Rolling Stone Interview he was open and introspective. We started out in a dank little room at a photo studio and continued in the recording studio where he does most of his work. The first day he lounged on a small black couch, wearing Nike gear and Jordans and picking at white-chocolate-covered nuts. Ever the fifteen-year-old, he said, "What's up?" and then asked, "Would you like to eat my white nuts?" He laughed. "C'mon, put my white nuts in your mouth."

Who in your family loved you? Did any of the adults make you feel special?

My Aunt Edna, which would be my great-aunt Edna, and my Uncle Charles, my great-uncle Charles. This was in Missouri. They're from my dad's side. They took care of me a lot. My Uncle Charles passed in '92 or '93, and Aunt Edna passed away just six months ago. She was, like, eighty-six. They were older, but they did things with me; they let me stay the weekends there, took me to school, bought me things, let me stay and watch TV, let me cut the grass to get five dollars, took me to the mall. Between them and my Uncle Ronnie, they were my solidity.

Did they connect you with your dad?

They'd tell me he was a good guy: "We don't know what your mother's told you, but he was a good guy." But a lot of times he'd call, and I'd be there — maybe I'd be on the floor coloring or watching TV — and it wouldn't have been nothing for him to say, "Put him on the phone." He coulda talked to me, let me know something. 'Cause as far as father figures, I didn't have any in my life. My mother had a lot of boyfriends. Some of 'em I didn't like; some of 'em were cool. But a lot would come and go. My little brother's dad was probably the closest thing I had to a father figure. He was around off and on for about five years. He was the dude who'd play catch, take us bowling, just do stuff that dads would do.

When I saw you playing with Hailie back in February, you were so respectful. A lot of people talk down to little kids, but you talk to her like she's intelligent.

Thank you for seeing that. I just want her and my immediate family — my daughter, my niece and my little brother — to have things I didn't have: love and material things. But I can't just buy them things. I have to be there. That's a cop-out if I just popped up once in a while, didn't have custody of my daughter and my niece.

Do you have full custody?

I have full custody of my niece and joint custody of Hailie. It's no secret what's been going on over the past year with my ex-wife. I wouldn't down-talk her, but with her bein' on the run from the cops I really had no choice but to just step up to the plate. I was always there for Hailie, and my niece has been a part of my life ever since she was born. Me and Kim pretty much had her, she'd live with us wherever we was at.

And your little brother lives with you.

I've seen my little brother bounce around a lot from foster home to foster home. My little brother was taken away by the state when he was eight, nine.

You were how old?

I was twenty-three. But when he was taken away I always said if I ever get in a position to take him, I would take him. I tried to apply for full custody when I was twenty, but I didn't have the means. I couldn't support him. I watched him when he was in the foster home. He was so confused. I mean, I cried just goin' to see him at the foster home. The day he was taken away I was the only one allowed to see him. They had come and got him out of school. He didn't know what the fuck was goin' on. The same thing that had happened in my life was happening in his. I had a job and a car, and me and Kim, we bounced around from house to house, tryin' to pay rent and make ends meet. And then Kim's niece was born, which is my niece now through marriage. Watched her bounce around from house to house — just watchin' the cycle of dysfunction, it was like, "Man, if I get in position, I'm gonna stop all this shit." And I got in position and did.

So you have joint custody of Hailie, but she lives with you and spends most of her time with you and not with Kim.

I don't know if I'm inclined, or allowed, to say more than what is fact. In the last year, Kim has been in and out of jail and on house arrest, cut her tether off, had been on the run from the cops for quite a while. Tryin' to explain that to my niece and my daughter was one of the hardest things I ever had to go through. You can never let a child feel like it's her fault for what's goin' on. You just gotta let her know: "Mom has a problem, she's sick, and it's not because she doesn't love you. She loves you, but she's sick right now, and until she gets better, you've got Daddy. And I'm here."

What are your goals and principles as a dad? I'm sure there are boundaries.

Bein' a dad is definitely living a double life. As far back as I can remember, even before Hailie was born, I was a firm believer in freedom of speech. I never wanted to compromise that, my artistic integrity, but once I hit them gates where I live, that's when I'm Dad. Takin' the kids to school, pickin' 'em up, teachin' 'em rules. I'm not sayin' I'm the perfect father, but the most important thing is to be there for my kids and raise them the right way.

What are your biggest rules as a parent?