Wedding Crashers

On the lush green grounds of the Getty Museum, in Los Angeles, Wilson is sitting in the shade, at a table, munching away on a Rice Krispie Treat, just hanging out and talking about some of his preferences in women. He is, he says, primarily an ass man. "It seems to me if a girl has a good ass, she has a good body," he's saying, "but I'd almost just as soon not have sex if you're going to have to wear one of those, even though it's hard to find the moral high ground when making that argument to a girl. Anyway, there are other ways."

As it turns out, this overall general attitude of his recently made the news, in a half-blind item in the New York Post, as follows: "Which blond stud, nicknamed the 'Butterscotch Stallion,' has a perverse sexual bent? He recently picked up a girl at a wedding [!], and the two went back to his hotel room. When the woman asked if he had a condom, the actor replied, 'I don't want to have sex with you, but I do want to do something else' -- and proceeded to lick her buttocks for 'over two hours.' "

OK, so Wilson's real interest in butts is allegedly as objects to be licked. It's nothing to be ashamed of, really, and Wilson probably isn't, nor is he likely to be upset by his fling's loose talk. It comes with the territory, and he's got a sunny attitude about such things.

"It's like, 'Who cares?' " he says. "I play it as it lays. OK, so I may not be the greatest lover in the world. Well, let's make that angle work. There's lots of different paths to the waterfall. You don't have to be Don Juan. And wasn't it Gloria Steinem who said that women have to be responsible for their own orgasms? Well, I take her at her word. I'll do my best, OK, but at a certain point you've got to, like, you know...."

(Excerpted from RS 979, July 28, 2005)