The Man Who Wasn't There

Played for big, broad laughs, what the movie is really about is identity. At one point, Downey's Lazarus says, "I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude," which is a perfect line for Downey to have to deliver, because in a sense, his own identity, and who he really is, has long been up for grabs. Only two years ago, he looked at himself and his situation this way: "I'm not an actor. It's my day job, and I learned how to hustle it really good. [But] it's a hustle. I got some fuckin' juice, man, I got some tools. . . . I learned some shit. I learned shit on the streets. It was providence, dude, and proximity to where I could get my grift on. . . . This is fuckin' gypsy heaven, dude — there's a million suckers out here."

What a great big bag of shiftless hooey.

"When did I say that?" he says today, picking through his Scottish salmon. "Was it more than three weeks ago? Puh-leaze! That guy is someone who is a foulmouthed liar who thinks he sounds really hip. As far as faking and a hustle, how could I bring I-want-to-say depth to my work if that's all it was? How could I do that?"

The answer is, it all depends on how good your grift is when you get it on. But let's give the guy a break and take him at his word. It's the summer of Downey, after many long, hard, cold winters, and he deserves it. Like his old friend Mel Gibson says, "He's ebullient and mercurial, up and down like a yo-yo, but he's grown, and he's going to move forward and conquer the world. And you know what? He's a good guy. That's what he is. He always is, always has been, always will be, no matter what kind of hot water he gets in."

It's time for him to head home now. He's got to get back to Susan, his wife of three years, and Indio, 14, his son from his previous marriage. Before leaving, however, he's got one or two things left to say. "I'm such a work in progress at the moment, it's crazy, and life wants me on edge, I swear to you," he says. "But as long as I don't forget the past, I'm cool. One must always be mindful, just like you might forget that old girlfriend who tried to slit your throat, but she's really still hot. If you remember the stitches more than you remember the pussy, you're going to be just fine." Then he closes his eyes and is silent for a brief moment, lizardlike, steady right where he is, hot, rock, sun, fly and tongue.