Kristol: “…can be assured that Senator Mccain, in addition to being a staunch supporter of the…”

Rush: “Billy-Boy, you can take those duck-billed platitudes and shove ‘em up your snuflleupagus! If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you twice: ‘we’re giving every last sand-flea the nooky-blood treatment – the real Valerie Plame leak, as it were – and that’s final!’ Ahem, pass me another ZoomZoom.”

“I have this megaphone because nobody seems to be listening to me anymore….or paying attention when I trash somebody…so…I’ll yell louder and try to pretend the Republican nominee really MATTERS for 2008…”

Kristol: [speaking with verve and conviction] “As my esteemed teacher once proclaimed:’sometimes democracy must be bathed in blood!’”

El Rushbo: [emerging from a table at a recent PNAC luncheon to heckle Kristol, first he glances at the megaphone quizically and then inquires in his trademark stentorian manner] “Has anyone ever heard a man break wind through a megaphone? It’s almost as exciting as listenning to this arsehole pontificate.”

You know, Rush…With that cigar in your mouth, you remind me of a dog taking a dump.

“From one unintelligent blowhard to another…..”

“Billy, you look marvelous!”

Hey Rush get that turd outta your mouth cigars over here.

I’m kind of partial to the way that Monica Lewinsky smokes them!!
I’m told she can smoke more than one of them at a time, and when she’s finished smokin, she just shoots them across the room and out the window!!

“Hey Bill, I can see your hippocampus through your ear, if I hold this thing right…Say Cheese!”

Professor Kristol, your Weekly Standard pro-war articles are the apotheosis of our treasured imperialist mission, your Harvard course on Xenophon “the Hawk” deeply scintillating, your rapid shift away from the PNAC a brilliant end-around, your landing the Op-Ed spot on the NY Times a brilliant feat of reverse liberalism, and your pedigree beyond compare, but, sir, Why are you backing John McCain when at best he’s only half a Neocon who’s done more flipflopping in the past eight years than Flipper did during his entire career?

“Cripes, Rush, not ALL of us have had our hearing blown out by OxyContin, you know.”

Kristol: Lets kick off the McCain Lovefest with the number three reason that Republicans and Neocons are despised around the world. Ladies and Gentlemen, Rush and his magic megaphone!

Kristol: Thanks Rush but I don’t need your megaphone to sound obnoxious and pompous. Besides, I have no idea where its been.

Do I hear …. Crickets?
Put the cigar and megaphone down, before I shove both up your butt.