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The Dirty Mind and Lonely Heart of John Mayer

Page 4 of 4

A few cute girls walk by. Mayer finally stops talking. He looks at them but that's all. "If I talk to them, I'm expressing an interest I'd be betraying if I saw someone else that I wanted to talk to more. It's too early in the evening, and they'd be a sidecar. Anyway, here's how tonight's going to go. After this, I'm going to go home, smoke weed, and play Modern Warfare 2. It's what I'm going to do all night." But then he tilts his nose into the air, says he's good with scents and would bet money that one of the girls is wearing a perfume called Child. "If you're wrong, you're an idiot. If you're right, you're like James Bond."

He turns to them. "Excuse me, can I be rude and ask you a question? Is somebody here wearing Child?"

Silence.

Then, a blonde: "I am," she says. "Well done."

So, tonight he's like James Bond. Tomorrow, who knows?

 This story is from the February 4th, 2010 issue of Rolling Stone.

To read the new issue of Rolling Stone online, plus the entire RS archive: Click Here

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