Katy Perry says she's still "madly in love" with John Mayer and gets candid about her marriage to ex-husband Russell Brand in the July issue of Vogue, as part of an interview in which she also talked about working on her new album.
Perry and Mayer started dating after she split from Brand, and though the pop singer and guitar player have since broken up, citing their busy schedules, her feelings for him haven't subsided. "I was madly in love with him. I still am madly in love with him," she said. She continued, "All I can say about that relationship is that he's got a beautiful mind. "Beautiful mind, tortured soul. I do have to figure out why I am attracted to these broken birds."
The other broken bird is Brand, the British actor and comedian to whom Perry was married – until he told her by text on New Year's Eve in 2011 that he wanted a divorce after 14 months, during which she was often the butt of his jokes onstage and, even more often, alone. Brand, she said, is "Hysterical in some ways. Until he started making jokes about me and he didn’t know I was in the audience, because I had come to surprise him at one of his shows. So. Hysterical to a point. I mean, I have to claim my own responsibility in things. I do admit that I was on the road a lot. Although I invited him time and time again, and I tried to come home as much as I possibly could," she says.
For a while, she says that she felt her status as equally successful appealed to Brand, but eventually made him uncomfortable. She believed that was a contributing factor to the demise of her marriage, but later learned there was another reason, which she declined to discuss.
"I found out the real truth, which I can't necessarily disclose because I keep it locked in my safe for a rainy day," she said. "I let go and I was like: This isn't because of me; this is beyond me. So I have moved on from that."
Perry said that right now she's concentrating on strengthening herself and developing an emotional support system. "I believe that I will be loved again, in the right way. I know I'm worth it."
She's also working on a new album, though she divulged few details, apart from saying that she feels most like herself when she's writing and recording.
"When I am in between records, sometimes I doubt myself," she said. "I'll be like: Did I just get lucky, or did I mass-manipulate the world into thinking that seven songs were worth a Number-One position? And then I go back into the studio and I start writing, and the true essential oil of who I am comes bubbling back up and reminds me that it's always been inside of me, that nobody can take this away no matter what comment anyone makes. It's going to be there because it's what I was born with and it's what I've worked on my whole life."