Ten minutes into this puke-slick remake of Wes Craven's infamous 1972 revenge classic on rape, torture and murder, I knew this crapathon would give Watchmen a run for its money as this weekend's top box-office bell ringer. Such is the debased state of American moviegoing barely three months into the new year, a time when profits soar and taste sinks to sewage levels. Craven, influenced by Ingmar Bergman's Virgin Spring and the real-life Charles Manson murders, found creative ways to plumb the dark depths of human nature. And he did it with no cash. Remake director Dennis Iliadis, with a studio budget and a galling, glib cynicism, is merely cashing in. So when a fate worse than death befalls young Mari (Sara Paxton) at the hands of creeps, and her parents (Tony Goldwyn and Monica Potter) predictably seek vengeance, audiences with a brain cell left have only one choice: Look for the first exit on the right.

“Time to Pretend”

Listening to MGMT’s breakthrough song, one might interpret it as being about the excesses of rock stardom, but it’s actually about the duo’s pet praying mantis. Ben Goldwasser and Andrew VanWyngarden told Rolling Stone they got the idea from the insect's jerky movements. The mantis died, but the two bandmates kept the egg sack and allowed the hundreds of eggs to hatch. “We tried to name them all, but they died after a day,” said Goldwasser, with VanWyngarden chiming in, “But the praying mantis dance inspired us.”