After the Sunset

What could be so bad about watching body-beautiful actors sipping rum drinks in the Bahamas while planning a diamond heist and wearing almost nothing? Plenty. Case in point: After the Sunset — a movie utterly devoid of wit , excitement and any reason for being. Blame must be piled on director Brett Ratner (Red Dragon), who fails to give the film a pulse. Pierce Brosnan plays Max, a jewel pirate who heads to the Caribbean with his partner, Lola (Salma Hayek), promising to quit stealing, marry Lola and settle down. But then a Napoleon diamond sails into harbor, along with FBI agent Stan Lloyd (Woody Harrelson), who's been chasing the couple for seven years. And just when you expect the plot to thicken, it congeals. This is one of those movies where the actors seem to be having a helluva time while you sit there in agony over your time and money lost. The jokes? In one boat scene, Harrelson catches a shark and then reads the fish its rights before shooting it. The final straw? Max renting a DVD of Hitchcock's To Catch a Thief, a class-act that shows up this copy as rank garbage that came in with the tide.

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